GONE (COMPLETED)

CH. 05

I was so happy after getting my report card, I'm on my way to Thea's building in our University. I wanted to show it to her first before I need to go home. I feel so excited as I went to their room, I already know Thea's schedule that's why I didn't bother to inform her. I wanted to surprise her for my unexpected appearance.

My face fell as I got to their room. Ericka's clinging to my girlfriend makes my anger grow deep inside me. I tightened my grip on my report card. My heart is aching just watching my girlfriend looks so happy. That bitch really know where her place is. I marched towards them and that's the time they look at me. Thea instantly stand and remove Ericka's hand on her shoulder before she went towards me.

"Baby." — she uttered as she hold my both shoulder. I was not looking at her since my gaze was with Ericka who's smirking at me. She rolled her eyes and flipped her hair before she went to her other friends. I heard Thea's classmates murmuring to each other since they know how immature I act whenever I feel jealous. I don't care about them, I don't care whatever they say as long as I have Thea. "Baby look at me." — I heard Thea said to me while she caressed my face. I became calm as I felt her soft voice calling me. I look at her and she looks so worried at me. I close my eyes before I grab her hand and drag her outside their room.

"I really don't like her clinging on you" — I sternly said to her. She let out a sigh as she rubbed her thumb the back of my hand.

"She's my bestfriend and I'm used to her being clingy towards me." — paliwanag nito sa akin, I stomped my feet after hearing her respond.

"No!" — matigas na usal ko. She was surprised for the tone of my voice.

"Jes, look— please stop being immature, okay? Bakit ka ba nagseselos sa Bestfriend ko?" — nawawalan na ng pasensyang tankng nito sa akin. Napalunok naman ako dahil sa tono ng pananalita nito. Is she annoyed with me? I'm so fucking jealous here but she doesn't care about what I feel. I look at her coldly as I pull away my hand on her grasp. She look at me confusedly.

"Thea she likes you, can't you see the way she acted towards you? Hindi mo ba nararamdaman? O talagang nagmamaamg maangan ka lang?" — I asked her furiously. I'm so mad right now that I wanted to hurt that bitch. Even if Thea is defending her bestfriend's action, I will never have the guts to hurt her physically.

"What the hell are you talking about? Lahat na lang binibigyan mo ng malisya Jessi." — she said sound mad. And now she's mad at me? Wow, I can't believe her acting like this towards me. I tried so hard not to breakdown but my tears betrayed me. She was stunned at the moment she saw me crying. Her eyes soften and tried to hold me but I move backward. "Baby." — she called me. But I was only looking at her blankly, I'm so hurt that I'm wishing to be gone for mean time. It feels like someone is stabbing my heart by just looking at her.

"Here is my report card." — I said between my sob. She looks so confused as she reach for my report card. Tears are threatening to fall on her eyes but I feel so numb right now that I can't feel anything. I just wanted to runaway, I've never thought I'll be able to feel this towards the person I love.

"Jes, look— baby please, I'm just— baby." — she rambling not know how to complete her sentence. I was crying silently, just letting my tears to fall. I don't know what I look right now but it doesn't matter anymore. I thought this day will be one of the best day since my grades are all positive. Is it my fault why this is happening? Why we're arguing? Is it my jealousy? Alam naman ni Thea kung gaano ako kaselosa. Maybe I overacted.

I'm annoyed, yes, to myself especially. I really can't control my feelings. She was looking at my report card and that's my cue to walk away from her for the first time. I do love her but maybe— my love is too much and unhealthy. I don't want to be a burden in her life anymore, maybe this is the right to do, to be gone forever in her life. When I was already outside their building someone hugged me behind. Her scent is so familiar to me, I remover her hand and face her. She was crying as she holding my hand tightly.

"Baby please. Stop deciding when you're emotional." — she said. I place my hand on her cheeks and wipe her tears.

"You know how jealous I am when it comes to your Bestfriend." — I said. I smiled at her bitterly as I hold my sob.

"Baby no, please let's talk later, okay?" — she said trying to convince me.

"Sweetheart I don't know anymore. I'm so lost right now." — I told her honestly. She shake her head as she move forward and cupped my face.

"Come on, look at me." — she said which I obey.

"I love you." — she whispered, I sniffed and pouted because my heart just melt on how she look at me. She kissed my forehead before she drag me towards her car on the parking lot.

"Ihahatid na kita then we'll talk later, okay?" — she said softly, I just nodded my head as I keep on playing my fingers on my lap. I feel so nervous, did I really consider to walk away from her life? Letting her go? OH myy God! I've never thought I would ever think about that since I'm so deeply, madly inlove with Thea. My sweetheart. Why I always behave impulsive? I so hate myself, my sweetheart just cried again because of me. I look at her and she's very silent while driving.

"Baby are you hungry?" — Thea asked me as she stope a glance at me before she look back at the road.

"Ahm— no, I just want to lay on my bed... with you." — I said and murmured the last word. I don't know if she heard it right but she didn't reacted.

When we reached home, she open the door for me and intertwined our fingers. I really feel butterflies on my stomach so I bite my lower lip at the sight of our hands. My mom hugged us before she let us walked to my room.

The vibes was so awkward that's why I was looking down only. Thea put her palm on my chin to lift up so she can look a me properly.

"Baby look at me." — she softly said. I pouted at the sight of her soft gaze at me. "Hush... don't cry." — she added.

"I'm sorry for behaving like that sweetheart. I didn't mean to walk away from you." — I hysterically said. She nodded her hand as she rub my left cheek.

"It's okay, I'm at fault too, I should tried enough to make you calm a while ago." — she said disappointed. "I was— I'm just surprised by your sudden visit." — she added. I hugged her as I keep on saying how sorry I am.

Will she able to handle me? Will she always be my understanding girlfriend? Will she always be my sweetheart?

Habang tumatagal mas natatakaot ako na mawala dya sa buhay ko. I maybe impulsive but my feelings towards Thea will never changed. I was born to love her forever.

"Okay, let's cuddle as you wished baby." — she said. I let her guide me to lay on my bed. "Let's talk later." — she added when she wrapped her arms in my waist. I hummed before I close my eyes and fell asleep.