The Bad Boy Kept Me Sane

CHAPTER 10

Chapter 10

Carmella's POV

The next day I woke up, realizing that I went to sleep not thinking so much. I actually had fun yesterday.

My thoughts were startled when I heard shouting downstairs. When I thought that everything was just starting to be fine.

I didn't bother to listen. Next thing I knew my mom came barging in my room. I noticed a tinge of pink turning black on her cheek.

"He hit you again." I said in a matter of fact kind of way.

" I'm leaving. I'm not coming home til next week. I'll be at my office at the hospital if you need me. Your father is just too much already. This is nothing dear. Don't worry about it"

"Ok mom" I said in a flat emotionless tone.

"Sweetie I'm sorry to be leaving again. It's just that your father and I need to have some space away from each other to think."

I felt the anger rise in me. Emotions that were gone for a day suddenly came rushing back. I felt helpless.

I just nodded and she came to give me a hug. I just let her embrace me, not giving the gesture back. Holding back tears of anger.

"Just go, mom. "

She looked at me with tears welling in her eyes. I know it hurts her to be like this, but she's not doing anything about it either.

"Sorry sweetie, I'll be back soon. Just call or come by. I love you very much. " She said stroking her thumb across my cheek.

I couldn't take anymore of this thinking. I feel like a little bit more of bullshit and I'm going to loose my sanity. I let out a frustrated groan on my pillow. I stood up and took my meds but this time I doubled the dose. I decided to take a walk. Anywhere but here.

I covered up in a coat and went strolling down the block.  I went to starbucks and grabbed a cup of coffee. I just walked around the neighborhood enjoying my surroundings till I ended up at the ferry. I just sat there staring out at the ocean.

I had a lot of things on my mind. Like why does this stuff happen to me, what if I had a different family would everything turn out different? A tear rolled down my cheek. Life is so damn unfair.

I screamed to the top of my lungs. Tears flowing.

I didn't even realized that it what already dark till Ethan came looking for me. He always knows to look here if he can't find me.

"ELLA! WTF!!! YOU HAD ME WORRIED SICK! WHY WOULD YOU NOT PICK UP YOUR PHONE OR AT LEAST TELL US WHERE YOU ARE!"  He embraced me in a tight hug and I cried all over again.

He took me home. We ate dinner in silence and I curled up in my bed. I didn't have anymore energy from all the thinking the crying and just everything else that's going on. I'm seriously thinking of something thats not pretty.

****

School the next morning was like every other morning. Classes, boring teachers, nosy students.

When lunch break came around Jess and Jay were already at our table. I joined them and greeted them with a groan.

" Rough night again, Ella?" I heard Jay ask.

" No. Actually my night was pretty enthusiastic" I said in a highly sarcastic tone.

"Geez no need to go all bitchy on me"

I saw Jay's eyes widen at something behind me. I turned and was shocked too.

"Hi Ella. Mind if I join you? Jared asked.

" Uhm yea. Sure. I guess. What about your, you know 'Reputation' I said.

He laughed. "Nevermind. I can deal with it. "

Suddenly all of his friends came by and raided our table too.

" I hope you don't mind the crew to join"

" Well I can't really just kick you all out, now can I? I fear for my dear life you know. "

They all laughed.

Nick was the smart one, you could tell. Jake was the cocky one, Kyle was the hopeless romantic and Ryan was bad ass next to Jared who would beat the living daylights out of someone. They were a cool crew. I don't know why I felt comfortable around Jared even though I know he has a bad side.

I gazed around the cafeteria when I saw Adam. He had a dark furious glint in his eyes. He had his hands in a fist and lookeld like he was ready to punch someone. He was glaring directly in our direction. I gulped. Remembering the last encounter I had with him. I squeezed Jess' hand, I was starting to hyperventilate. She knew what was going on and immediately excused us from our table.

" Were just gonna get some air" She said.

" Are two okay? Do you want me to come with you?" Jared said. The group was looking at us with concerned looks . Jess gave them the do-not-push it look and they nodded.

We went out the cafeteria and sat on the bleachers for a while. I told Jess what I saw.

" Well you know they've been rivals ever since, maybe it was just Jared"

"He's just creepy and I don't want another breakdown from him" I said.

She embraced me and after calming down we went back inside. Lucky for us we got there just before the bell rang.

"Ella you okay? Sorry if we made you uncomfortable"

" No no.. It's not you or them, it's just me, I got to go"

I ran off to my next class. I thinked about it. They were getting too close to us, and I don't want any of them to know what happened before.

Now I was scared again. Scared to trust, and scared that what happened might scare them away from me. I can't take that. Being rejected because of a dark past. I don't want to feel hurt once again.

______________________________________________

A/N: So Jared huh?? *wiggles eyebrows* Trust me, there's more to him. He has his secrets too.

Guys! COMMENT. VOTE. FOLLOW PLEASE!!! FEEDBACKS TOO! LOVE YOU ALL!

xoxo - J