Easy Silence

34.

"And you're sure I look alright?"

"Mer, for the millionth time, you look completely stunning," Derek laughed softly, letting her lean into his hand resting on the small of her back. "And stop tugging at your dress, you're fine."

"I'm not comfortable," she sighed.

"Clearly," he laughed again.

"Okay, you know when it's not the time to laugh?" she frowned, swatting at her boyfriend's arm. "When your girlfriend is wearing a dress and being dragged into a party with famous people, famous people, Derek. And I'm me. So now, now is not the time to laugh."

"Meredith, they're not famous people."

"Yes they are."

"Okay...well...that makes me a famous person and you're dating me so I'm missing the whole freak out point."

"You're not a famous person, you're an idiot."

"I'm taking you to a fancy fundraiser and this is the thanks I get," he laughed, holding her closer as they finally reached the front door of the banquet hall. "Meredith, if you don't want to do this, we can turn around, go home and curl up in our pjs in front of a movie. It's okay."

"No...it's....no....I'll do this," Meredith nodded slowly. "It's just..."

"Just?"

"There's a lot of really beautiful people in there. Like really beautiful and rich and fabulous and I'm...I'm not. I've seen your team mates wives and then there's...I'm not those people. I'm not beautiful and I...I shouldn't be here. I really, I love you and I'm doing this but I don't fit. I'm not one of those crazy beautiful people that put on a dress and go out and I'm not and I can't."

"You're beautiful."

"You...you have to say that," she murmured. "You're my boyfriend."

"And someone else's opinion matters?"

"The...the guy I want to pick up," she giggled nervously, fighting the urge to fidget with her hands. It would probably mess up her manicure or something. The manicure had been a stupid idea, surgical interns didn't get manicures. But hockey players girlfriends did so she had gotten one and now she definitely felt really stupid. Even if Derek thought she was beautiful or whatever, she felt stupid and this was definitely going to go bad. So she was allowed to giggle nervously and joke about picking up other guys.

"I love you," he murmured.

"I love you too," she sighed. "And...we're doing this. I'll...I can do this. I just...Cinderella or whatever. I can pretend I'm...someone who's not me."

"That's what works best at these things," Derek nodded, kissing her gently before leading her into the room.

Meredith took a deep breath and leaned further into her boyfriend. She was used to these things, or maybe not used to yet but she would be because doctors had to go to these kind of things all the time. There were probably doctors at this thing. It was just weird. Because she wasn't there as a doctor, it wasn't a fundraiser for her hospital, but she was here because people wanted her boyfriend to be here. Her boyfriend who was kind of famous and usually she could forget all about that, but tonight she couldn't. Derek was at this thing, wearing a tux because he was famous enough for people to want him there. Which was insane, and it basically meant that she had no idea what she was doing here.

"Breathe," he murmured.

"Easy for you to say," Meredith groaned.

"I hate these things too, Mer," Derek sighed as he smiled and nodded at an older man. "But it's part of the job."