The Midnight Rantings Of Someone Lost

Faith

I hate the word mythology.
Over time the word has to developed to simply mean a "wrong religion" by many.
But that is not our judgement to make, that is no one's.
Mythology is a collection of myths, and often a belief system around it.
Myths are stories. They often have historical significance.
No one ever said the stories were true.
The idea that every myth happened, and is not to be debated is Christan.
I hate what mythology has grown to mean.
I have had an odd relationship with religion all my life, until recently I did not understand it.
The idea that mythology is wrong and in the past is harmful.
With time I have explored the belief system for me, building my own.
It embarrasses mythology, and paganism.
Years ago I would have said it was idiotic for following any mythology.
All my life the Christan faith has been seen as wrong.
My father having trama around it.
I never explored the idea of Christianity, and its variants.
I was born the daughter of a Jewish woman, I am and always be Jewish.
My ancestors were Gypsies, Roman soldiers, Celtic warriors, Scandinavian Vikings, Jews running from genocides, and Catholics.
To me Christianity is not my religion, it is one i could not follow with a clear conscience.
There is so much i know my ancestors do not approve of in my life, and they never will.
I do know they do approve of my relationship with my faith.
It may not be the same as thiers.
It is not the same as thiers.
They take pride in the way I follow the faiths of our people, the faiths lost to time, the mythologies.
They take pride in this because of what it means, I am proud of my ethnicities, for many times i they have been targets for it.
Growing up i was called savage, barbaric, and uncivilized for my Scandinavian heritage.¹
I have faced and will face antisemitism my whole life.
My father and grandmother dealt with genuine racism for being italian.²
And while I will never know my Irish family, I do know our history.
My ancestors take pride in my faith because they shaped it.
I hate the word mythology because of its reputation.
Faith is a weird thing, for everyone it is different.
Rather that hostility, open conversations must be had.
For we unite under the idea of questioning things.

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1) yeah that's a real thing that happened to me, i have no idea what those kids were on lmao
2) by no means was it severe, it was just slurs and shit
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Much like my faith i have a kinda weird relationship with this song. I originally took it as a rejection of the beliefs pushed on us, however i realized that was one interpretation. It is also heavy about control of the world and oneself, things I've dealt with. I think any interpretation can fit someone's relationship with their faith in someway hense me adding it, also Hozier is great.
Also ik the past two updates have been shorter, I've taken to just writing whenever, and publishing it once i feel it's done so