Percy Jackson's YouTube Channel

FLIRTING 101

@TheRealSeaweedBrain posted a new video.

Reyna and Thalia were sitting in front of the camera.

"Listen up bitches. Today we'll be talking about how to flirt." Thalia said. "Just some helpful hints and tips for the ladies. Once again, we highjacked Percy's account."

"First tip." Reyna said. "The quickest way to a gentleman's heart isn't through his stomach as most people believe. That will make him bleed out, so if you want the heart, you go through the fourth and fifth ribs."

"Second tip." Thalia said. "Kissing. Wrap your arms around his waist. Stick your hand in his back pocket. Grab his wallet. Don't kiss him. Run."

"Third tip." Reyna said. "How to take his breath away. Use the flat of your hand to slam him in the solar plexus. This winds him and gives you time to leave or knock him out. A punch to the jaw or jab to the temple works."

"Fourth tip." Thalia said. "Cooking his food. Now, cyanide smells like almonds. Therefore, buy or make something with almonds in it. Then put the cyanide in and give it to him."

"Fifth tip." Reyna said. "Pick up lines. Most are very cheesy and predictable. Thalia and I will give you some examples and how to respond."

"Hey baby." Thalia said in a deep voice. "Let's go out."

"No." Reyna said.

"Come on babe, what's a Juliet without her Romeo?"

"Alive." Reyna deadpanned.

"Well what's a queen without her king?"

"Historically speaking, more powerful."

"Can I buy you a drink?" Thalia asked.

"Actually, I'd rather have the money." Reyna said.

"Will you go out with me this Saturday?"

"Sorry, I'm having a headache this weekend."

"I think I can make you happy." Thalia smirked.

"Really? Are you leaving?" Reyna inquired.

"Where have you been all my life?"

"Hiding from you."

"Haven't I seen you some place before?" Thalia asked, thinking hard.

"Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore." Reyna smiled sweetly.

"You look like a dream."

"Go back to sleep."

"I know how to please a woman."

"Then please leave me alone."

"What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the world?"

"What's it like being the biggest liar in the world?"

"I can tell that you want me."

"To leave."

"I'd go through anything for you."

"Let's start with your bank account."

"Your place or mine?"

"Both. You go to your place, I'll go to mine."

"Your body is like a temple."

"You're right. It's a temple to Diana. We sacrifice men by beating them to death." Reyna said brightly.

"Is this seat empty?" Thalia asked.

"Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

"Sixth tip." Thalia said. "Dressing for a date. Don't wear a long dress. If necessary, wear a short, loose dress, or a dress with an easy to tear skirt. Wear long sleeves and pants to hide knives and daggers. Keep a very pointy pin in your hair. Make sure your hair is tied back. Hide a knife in your comb. Hide a poisonous needle in your lipstick. Wear shoes you can move in that have a reinforced sole. Bring gloves. You don't want finger prints. Bring hydrogen peroxide in your makeup remover to clean up the blood."

"Tip number seven." Reyna said. "Stay single or get a woman. See y'a."

Comments:

@Slayd_07
As a boy, I am very scared.

@Doughthedog
Thanks for the tips!

@thecoolcat
i ship those 2

@thecoolestcat
They should totally date!

@fortunecookie
There's this guy that keeps asking me out. It's really creepy. I'm going to use some of those anti-pick up lines.

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