Walking out of that court room with Hyunjin by his side was everything Chris ever dreamed of. At last he had some sort of closure. The future didn't seem so bleak after everything that had happened. Hyunjin's mother and sister left in a cab to their house just like Chris's parents left for theirs. The two of them just kept walking till they reached a little park and sat down on a bench. Chris couldn't help but look around and see the children running happily, see them hugging their parents and laughing as loud as they could. That was a childhood he and Hyunjin never had. They couldn't go back in time, but they could at least enjoy this part of their lives, be young and stupid. They could grow old without fear, get marry and have kids, raise them well, not like their father did. Make amends. They could. The only thing they had to do now was move on, stop dueling on their past, stop feeling guilty for a past they couldn't change and try to live the lives that were gifted to them. It seemed so easy, like it was only a few steps forward, but they knew better. They knew that it would take every single living moment of their lives, it would take every breath and every thought. And sometimes it would feel like they couldn't do it, sometimes it would feel like a waste of time, most of the times it would feel like it was impossible. But there would be times, small moments were they would feel powerful, in control of their future and their lives. Small moments that would grow if they tried hard enough. That was what Chris told himself as he looked at Hyunjin with hopeful eyes.
- We can do this Jinnie, we have each other. - and that sealed their fate.
After a few minutes of silence Chris walked Hyunjin home. Before he started to walk away Jin hugged him tightly and kissed him on the cheek.
- I love you little brother. - he said in a soft whisper before going to his boyfriend's house.
Jeongin was going to be alone all night, his parents went on a small vacation and his brother was at friends house. It was going to be a nice quiet night for the two of them. Chris just wanted to get there and cuddle with Jeongin on his bed while watching some movie. That would be the perfect night. Christopher got there and waited for the door to open.
- Hey Chris, I ordered pizza for us. Come on, it's in my room. - Jeongin said with a smile, after which he shortly kissed the other guy on the lips.
- Good, I can't wait to eat something. - Chris pulled Jeongin in to kiss him more passionately.
- What was that for?
- I just missed you. - Chris said softly and Jeongin laughed while getting him into the house and to his room.
They ate while listening to music. They found out they had the same taste in groups, they liked the same songs and the same artists. They found out they could never go to sleep early, at night they worked better. Chris showed him some of his songs and Jeongin sang a few of them. They were in their own bubble of love. Talking about music while eating and cuddling. Jeongin's sweet voice was melting Chris's walls, was reaching its way to his heart. It felt so easy to just fall in love right then and there. So easy to just give in. But, instead, Chris chose fear once more. More walls where going up around his heart, the only protectors of his vulnerable self, of the small and broken child that lied inside. Chris started to think that he would never accept love, no matter how harmless and beautiful it presented it self. Because he knew that even though Jeongin had the sweetest smile, the most carring but also sassy eyes he has ever seen, it would always feel like a Troyan horse. Those sweet kisses would some day change into his undoing, love would always stab him in the back. He just had to wait and see. But for today, he could stay. One more day of cuddles, of kisses, of inocent smiles during sex, of tired hugs and of sleep next to him. He could take one more day, the pain wasn't going anywhere. Neither was he.
It was good that Chris spent the night at Jeongin's house because not that far away Jisung was on his way to Chris and Minho's apartment. It was time, they both cried and suffer enough on their own. He needed his boyfriend back, he was going to fight with everything he had for it. Minho was going to take him back what ever the cost. At least that's what he said to himself, trying to think positive so things would work out well.
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Up To Scratch
Fanfiction- Jeongin, you should think it through. - What's there to think? Im really tired of guys my age, they aren't really interesting and the moment they see Changbin, they run away. It's no fun rebelling like that. Deep in thought, he was trying to come...
