Minho woke up a Friday morning feeling exhausted, feeling done with everything and everyone. Just like every other day in the past three months. But today, today he had enough. Without even having breakfast he made a small bag with his clothes. He hoped he could leave without waking anyone up. He hoped no one would notice he left.
- Minho? Where are you going? - Hyunjin asked half asleep from the couch.
- Oh... I'm sorry I woke you Jinnie, I'm taking a few days off. - he answered nervous.
- You are leaving? - he asked scared.
- Just for a few days, don't worry, I'll be back in no time. - he said with a reasuring smile.
He closed the door behind him and got into his car. He drove to the Bukhansan mountain, he used to love hiking with his parents or alone there. He put on a pair of good sneakers and his headphones. He needed some peace and quiet. Minho called his boss that day and told him he was sick so he had a few days off, he also left a small text for Chris telling him he was going to be back probably by monday. He was going to stay at the first crappy hotel he could find and just hike for the following days. Him, the mountain and the music and no one else. He knew that Chris would understand why he left, he knew him the best out of everyone. He knew he wasn't going to judge him. Now Jisung was another story all together. Minho was sure he wouldn't get it, he wouldn't understand the pressure he was in, he has been in the past 6 years. Jisung was loving and caring, he was there to make him feel better, to give him a hug when he needed it or a kiss with no words involved. He helped him sleep because he made him feel at peace. They loved each other and they would do anything to make the other happy. That didn't mean everything was forgiven. Minho still felt that Jisung didn't understand the risk of things and the toll they have on you, he still felt taken for granted by him like by everyone else. Jisung never made him feel special. So he wandered sometimes why they where still together. He wandered how they were able to understand everyone else, but each other. So they had sex, slept in the same bed almost every night, hoping the physical contact could bring them closer. Hoping that would erase the hurtful words and the angry looks they haven't forgotten nor forgiven.
After the first day off Minho went to a bar to have a drink and then go to bed. He hadn't gone drinking in a very long time, or at least it felt like that. He had turned his notifications off because his phone had been ringing like crazy. He knew it wouldn't be important till his parents or Chris where the ones calling. So he didn't answer. Instead he sat there on the bar and waited for the bartender to get him a beer. Just that one beer and he would go to bed. At least that's what he thought he would do, but he ended up talking to the guy next to him and in no time they had drank over 10 beers together. His friend, who's name was Juyeon, was clearly flirting with him, but Minho was either too drunk or too oblivious to notice. He, despite being incredibly good looking, wasn't used to people flirting with him. Minho used to be the one to make the first move or end a conversation before it started. He never took an interest in anyone when he was in a relationship, he never chose not to cheat on a his partners, he just never wanted to. It wasn't a choice because that wasn't an option for him. If he ever was truly intrested in someone else, he would end his relationship and move on. He knew what it felt to be cheated on and what it felt to not be seen by a partner. So Minho decided long ago to never put anyone else through that. So that's why he didn't understand why this strangers eyes seemed so beautiful, or why his lips seemed so kissable. And just thinking about it was killing him, he had a boyfriend waiting for him back home, someone who was worried about him. Someone who hadn't stopped texting him since he left. He hadn't decide to leave to do this, he wasn't there to act like an asshole and cheat on his boyfriend. He was there to clear his mind and regain strength to go back home and be the nice, helpful and available friend and partner he was. Except he didn't want to do that, he didn't want to go back and be the exact same person he became to hate. If that was what he had to go back to, he never wanted to go back at all. No boyfriend, no friends, no brother and no parents to take care off. Just this handsome stranger who seemed too good to be real. Whitch is exactly what he needed. Maybe with just one kiss he would feel better, maybe if he got closer he could touch haven. But his lips tasted sour, nothing like the sweet mouth of Jisung. And his eyes now seemed hollow, not like his boyfriend's, who where like the clearlest window to his soul. Minho pulled back, apologized and left as quickly as he could. He had made a mistake. In his neverending bitterness he betrayed the trust of the person he loved the most. So he ran, again.
Minho took his car keys and drove as fast as he could back to his house. Which had been incredibly dangerous given the fact that he was drunk, thankfully he didn't hurt anyone and he hadn't been arrested. He arrived at 3 in the morning. He drove like crazy, but the moment he stepped out of his car, he walked as slowly as humanly possible. He opened the door to his apartment and the first thing he saw was Chris sitting on the couch drinking a beer while watching TV at low volume. He closed the door behind him with his brother's gaze on him. The moment he turned to look Chris in the eye, he spoke.
- I made a mistake Chris. - he said softly, after which he started to cry slowly and quietly.
YOU ARE READING
Up To Scratch
أدب الهواة- Jeongin, you should think it through. - What's there to think? Im really tired of guys my age, they aren't really interesting and the moment they see Changbin, they run away. It's no fun rebelling like that. Deep in thought, he was trying to come...
