Seasonal Scrawl | Collection

(02)

Tears slipped down his eyes even as his back hit the back of the sofa with a thud. He dint know what to react or what to feel. Before he could process anything, his phone buzzed with the caller id showing 'Dhara Bhabhi'. Taking a deep breath, he picked the call.

What he heard from her just left him devastated. Despite reading the letter, he somewhere hoped the first line wasn't true. That it was him who wasn't reading it right. But what his Bhabhi had informed had confirmed, this was the truth. He wordlessly hung up and collapsed on the floor crying.

She was gone! Gone forever! And he wasn't even there to see her for the last time! In the eyes of the world and she herself, he hated her. But in reality, he dint hate her. How could he ever hate her who was his only best friend? Shiva never did hate Raavi, he pretended to. If he did hate someone, it was his Maami aka her Mausi. He pushed her away because she was related to his Maami. He knew this was wrong but the son who knew Maami was the reason his father died, Maami was the reason his mother and Bhabhi who was equivalent to his mother suffered so much couldn't bring it within himself to have any connection with someone from that family. And so he had pushed her away right when they were kids, had let go when he felt it wouldn't hurt much and put up his pretence of hating her with passion. But letting her go had been a mistake and soon he had to kill the friend within him to uphold the son who still believed he had done right.

The hurt in her eyes initially broke him as well but even as she masked it with her hate, he did too. Soon he grew to believe he had successfully made her hate him and that things were better now. With time, he had moved on!
And now, after all these years he had come to know, she hadn't! That she loved him! That she had lived her entire life dedicating it to his love! That she had loved him so much that she had left her own family!

Shiva had moved on because Raavi was just his best friend but he hadn't once thought about her. He hadn't stopped to think if she had moved on. He hadn't given a single thought if she had actually let go. He had taken a decision and had thought of it just from his perspective. If only he had known, she hadn't moved on. That she loved him so much that it was impossible for her to move on!

Over the years, she had been pushed to just being a distant memory but for her, he had been her world throughout. Shiva dint know what to do about all this! Why did he have to learn all of this after she was gone?

Gone...... Raavi was gone! His best friend, his Maami Ki Behen Ki Beti was gone! She had suffered! She had struggled with her cancer for two years before ultimately succumbing to it.

He burst out crying more. He had pushed her away for his own selfishness.  Yet she continued to love him. He hadn't bothered to ask after her. Yet her love hadn't receded.

"Why Raavi? Why? Why did you love me so much? Why?" he uttered brokenly. In the one moment he knew, while he had pushed her to the corner, he hadn't been able to completely push her out of his system which is why, the Shiva of years back who was Raavi's best friend Shiva had returned in him, feeling all the emotions he would have if any of it were to happen to Raavi at that time when he was Raavi's Shiva.

A hand on his shoulder made him look up. It was his wife worriedly gazing at him.

"What happened Shiva? Why are you crying like this?" she asked worried.

"Saawan me uge phool aandhiyon ko seh nahi paaye isliye bikhar gaye. Par woh patta jo us waqt sambhal gaya, aaj hamesha hamesha ke liye murjha gaya hain. She's gone Kalpana! Raavi is gone!" he uttered sobbing. Kalpana held Shiva in her embrace and tried to calm him by rubbing his back while trying to contain her own tears. After all, she had lost a friend too!

Love,
Pratyusha

A/N

The translation for the letter shall be given in a few days