Anarchy Ladder - {H.S} au

PROLOGUE

If someone had asked me who Lennon Skyes was a year ago today, I would've told them these exact words.

I would have told them that Lennon Skyes is a field of red roses on a hot sunny day, forcing the beauty to blossom just like humans thrive, I would have told them that Lennon Skyes is the colour orange, inviting, energizing and full of vitality.

I knew myself from the inside out, I dissected every aspect of my existence because that was all I ever had to focus on. Was me and no one else, I was constantly there for others because I wanted to be, I never minded not having that in return, because I was comfortable with the feeling of loneliness.

I was at peace with being alone and I loved it, it only meant more time on finding myself, more time in discovering new music and what I personally appreciated, more time for new experiences and new beginnings without feeling the sense of judgement that other people my age seem to thrive on.

That was a year ago.

If someone were to ask me who exactly Lennon Skyes is now in this very moment, I would hesitate. Hell, I probably would have absolutely no words at all.

Even though I had it all.

I simply have no fucking clue who I am anymore. It's all a grey haze clouding my vision, like the pot smoke that tends to form a wall between me and my best friend. My best friend who I had fallen madly and deeply in love with ever since I moved here.

Harry.

Harry taught me so much, he taught me almost everything I now perceive as life. Meeting him at the start of this year was a blessing in disguise, he freed me, loved every inch of me, introduced me to many things and people that were a sense of escape.

He was a blessing, but also a curse.

Even though I thought that following exactly in his footsteps was almost like a feeling of walking on clouds with a warm light flowing from out of me, it blinded me from what was really going on underneath it all.

I was too blind in his presence, so hypnotized by his disposition that I had no fucking idea that he was the one slowly destroying my life at the same time.

Piece by piece, frame by frame.

"Take a leap of faith with me, Len." was always his go to phrase. And I always leaped.

Neither of us knew that we were slowly breaking each other down, it was "love".

So now, again, who is Lennon Skyes?

Lennon Skyes is a field of dying red roses being shaded by an overcast sky, Lennon Skyes is the shade of grey, the orange had gotten dull and even more dull as time went on.

And as I lay here on my back in the middle of Harry's bed with my hands folded over my stomach, I shut my eyes and smile softly.

"We have reached the top of the ladder Harry, it's time to come down."

SEE YOU SOON!