Across the Boulevard (Manila Girls #1)

Kabanata 48

Kabanata 48

Warning: SPG

Mahal

Hinigit ko si Rivan palayo sa mga tao. Dinala ko siya malapit sa opisina at dahil mayroong patio roon bago makarating sa pintuan, doon ko siya nilagay. Nagpatinaod naman siya sa akin at sinenyasan naman niya ang mga bodyguards niya na hayaan lang akong kaladkarin siya.

Nagkaharap kaming dalawa. Seryoso siya pero kita ko ang bahagyang pagkamangha sa kanyang mga mata habang tinatanaw ako.

It's like entertaining for him or something... Or baka kinikilig siya. Hindi ko alam.

"Anong sabi mo kanina? Marunong ka nang mag gitara?"

"Yes, Ma'am." He tilted his head to the side and smiled at me.

Napanguso ako, medyo natutuwa sa kanya ng kaunti. Kaya kailangan ko pang paalalahanan ang sarili na dapat magseryoso ako at sabihin na ang punto ko.

Who knows what stunt he could pull again? Maybe next time he'll announce to the world that we're getting married! Tapos hindi ko pala alam... Dapat alam ko...

At bakit ko nga ba iniiisip ang pagpapakasal?

"You didn't learn the guitar for me." Tikhim ko, pilit na nagsusuplada at nagseseryoso.

"Then let me show you-"

"No... I have no doubt that you can play the guitar now... I just doubt that you learned it for me."

"Guess what, Rai... I could do a lot of things for you."

"But guitar's not your thing... Naaalala ko noon na nagpapaturo ka kay Koseon at hindi ka makapagtagal..."

"I was so frustrated for so many years of not being able to be with you... This is the only way I think I could connect with you. And maybe with your recorded song..."

I bit my lower lip. I was instantly reminded of my parting birthday gift for him. I sang a song for him.

"When I miss you... I play it. I even bought a travel size CD player so I can bring it with me anytime."

"You liked it?" Tanong ko, medyo namamaos.

Tumango siya. Nagkatitigan kaming dalawa at wala na akong ibang masabi pa. Tila naubusan ako ng mga salita.

Suminghap ako at umatras saka unti-unting umikot para talikuran siya kaya lang naabot niya ang siko ko at marahan akong pinaharap sa kanya. Namungay ang mga mata kong nag-angat ng tingin sa kanya. Kumalabog ang dibdib ko at wala akong ibang marinig kundi ang ingay nito.

Marahan niyang binitawan ang siko ko at umangat ang gilid ng labi.

"I answered all your questions... It's time that you answer mine."

"I don't think I'm ready."

Parehas kaming napailing pero kalaunan ay tumango siya, tila nagpapaubaya at nagsasabing panalo ako. Panalo na naman ako.

"Of course... Whenever you're ready, Rai." Ngumiti siya kahit na kita ko roon ang lungkot niya.

Somehow, I want to talk to him too but I am just still so afraid right now for so many reasons. I'm sure that my anger and my pent-up frustrations about the past and our families are slowly fading away, but I need time... I know I've been given a lot of time already but I cannot force myself to move and and just forget everything all at once.

It takes a lot to do that. You always have to be patient with yourself, always.

Even though the teaching camping is over, I still have to do a lot of things for it. Nagpadala ako ng mga token of appreciations sa mga bigating bisita namin. Inayos at hinanda ang mga certificates at awards ng mga special awardees na hindi sinama noong program dahil hindi pa naman tapos ang lahat. Inayos ko rin ang mga dokumento at mga reports. I have seven teams helping me and we are almost done.