silence speaks in volumes {karlnap}

chapter 13

TW: bullying, homophobia, cyberbullying, mention of a panic attack

(Nick POV)

Karl and I get stares for the rest of the day. I'm used to getting stared at, so this isn't bothering me too much. Karl on the other hand... he hates it. He hasn't told me, but I can just tell. It's not good.

Since he's a year ahead of me, and we don't share any talents, we don't have any classes together. So I don't have any classes with him. Skeppy and George have a few with him, and they've been updating me. I didn't even ask them to. They've just been doing it. I'm grateful for it though.

They say that he's been panicky all day; wide eyed, looking around, cowering. It's as if he thinks something's going to pop out at him. It's awful to hear about. Part of me thinks this is my fault. I started talking to him in the first place.

The final bell jolts me from my thoughts. I jump up, barely managing to grab my things before I bolt out of the classroom.

As I'm running through the hallway, Dream and Bad must catch up with me, because they're next to me when I look left. "Oh, hi," I say. Bad smiles. 

Skeppy and George are already with Karl at his locker. We slow down as we approach them, as we don't want to bulldoze them to the ground.

"Hey," I say breathlessly as I come to a stop next to Karl. He smiles weakly and slides another sketchbook into place on his locker shelf. 

"Yeah, hi to you too, Nick," George says sarcastically. I shoot him a grin before turning my attention back to Karl. 

"Are you doing ok?" I ask quietly. He shrugs and nods at the same time. So-so. 

"That's good," Dream mutters. "If you want to stay that way, don't open Instagram."

My hand flies to my phone and I open Instagram. "I said don't open it!" Dream exclaims, trying to grab my phone. But I move away and look at my feed. The first thing I see makes me regret doing that.

It's a picture of Dream and George. They're in the middle of a mall, smiling at something off-screen. Their fingers are folded together, they're walking very close together, they look genuinely happy. I know what they're smiling at, though. It's me.

It was sometime last year. They had only been dating for a year at that point, because Dream's parents wanted them to wait until high school to date for unknown reasons. Anyway, Bad and Skeppy were busy that day, so the three of us went to the mall to spend some time that would be otherwise spent gorging on food or rotting our brains with way too much time spent on Minecraft, YouTube, or social media. The two of them had laughed at something I said that I can no longer remember. I also don't remember seeing anyone from school there.

A bit of text above the picture reads, "You Know the Hunter and the Huntress," which is a joke from Halloween freshman year. My stomach twists slightly. I swipe to see the next picture.

This picture is of Skeppy and Bad. They're sitting alone in the cafeteria, clear trays pushed to the side, a book open in front of them. Skeppy is resting his head on Bad's shoulder, most likely not paying attention to whatever's on the page. I'm not sure where me, Dream, or George are, but I'm probably halfway across the world with my mom. That's the only reason I skip school, unless I'm sick. The location of the other two remains a mystery.

The text on this picture reads, "And You Know About the Muffin and the Onion." Bad loves muffins, so that's where that came from. But I don't know where the onion came from. Probably a hamburger joke about Skeppy. I swipe again, against my better judgement. 

It's a picture of me and Karl from earlier.

"Introducing A New Pair of Fucking Homos,"

I swallow.