Assault With a Deadly Weapon || N.H / 1D

37.

Song recommendation: In This Shirt by the Irrepressibles

I'm sorry.
-

I needed to keep my attention on Niall. I had to or else I'd kill someone. Im sure he felt the same.

"No!" Winston protested from across the breakfast table. "I've read a book on astronomy! The universe is stagnant, eternal, and infinite!"

"Are you stupid? The Universe is an illusion!" Mikayla argued from the other side of the table. "We are alone in the cosmos and every object we see in the night sky is already dead! Everything is a hoax."

"Why would you even think that? That's physically impossible..."

I tuned out their conversation to make eye contact with Niall. He looked to be in pain from this conversation. I couldn't imagine how he was feeling. Even I knew that they were both wrong. Niall was surely holding back a lot of frustration.

He'd explained to me in great detail how the universe is not infinite, not eternal, not stagnant, and definitely not an illusion.

I wasn't allowed to sit with Niall during meals. We'd both figured that we'd only add fuel to the constant fire if we were to sit together. The McBride's were always arguing. Constantly. The upside of this was that it gave Niall and I plenty of time to make fun of them back in the wing.

"Was that what we sounded like when we first met?" I asked Niall quietly on the way up to the wing.

"One hundred percent, we hated each other." He laughed.

"It's just because you were so goddamn smart." I wrapped my arm around his waist, pulling him closer to me as we walked.

"Shit I thought it was because I smelled bad." He laughed, swinging an arm over my shoulders.

"Nope." I leaned my head on him.

I don't know what had come over us these past few days. I just felt the need to touch him constantly. Maybe it was because he was a familiar figure that was close to me. Or maybe it was the idea that I was most scared of. Maybe I liked him way more than I thought I did.

We obviously had feelings for each other, but up until our trip to the Hamptons, it had felt like a little fling. Nothing was serious. Now, it felt like a relationship. We weren't boyfriend and girlfriend. That was a terrifying label to me. I wasn't ready to be a girlfriend. But we slept in the same bed, we were always touching and kissing. Niall called me beautiful like it was my name.

I had just been telling myself that it was for the act, but lately it had been feeling so real. I was scared that the second we took down the organization we'd go back to how we were before.

As my head rested on his shoulder I felt those doubts floating around my head. I held him closer in that moment, savouring what I might never get again. Security.

"Get a room you two!" A voice said from behind us.

"That's what we were doing." Niall rolled his eyes before turning around.

"Julian." I let out a breath when I saw him at the bottom of the stairs.

"Arabella I know you're off today but I need to talk to you really quick." He pleaded.

I looked at Niall.

"I'll meet you in the wing." He kissed my temple before leaving me on the stairs with Julian.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Hey, truce remember?" He held up his hands. "I've been thinking a lot, and I feel like you're ready to work on our main problem."