make it easy | young royals ✓

nine

Simon

Forgiveness runs plentiful in my veins, and my mother has always invariably reminded me of those virtues. Lately, it's flowing thin, and sporadically, I'm promptly aware of the person I've become. Difficult to trust, and perhaps not as amiable as when I was nine months ago. A lot has changed, and it's all part of the variables which builds into my character.

Maybe everything can just slide back into place, and life will conceivably go on as if he never left last Christmas. Sometimes I feel like we've been apart for a year or only a single day. There's a saying that distance makes the heart fonder, and it's only been too tangible and concrete in the past few days.

All will be much more uncomplicated, simple, and effortless if I decide to love him. He's natural to be content with, and living becomes invigorating when he's around. My steps are lighter, and a faint, uncontrollable grin becomes a signature to my appearance.

For the past week, I settled into a routine of rekindling a friendship with Wilhelm. We sit together during the few classes we have together, and across each other at meals. In the morning or afternoon at rowing practice, we share exasperated glances while August barks orders at us to work harder. It feels almost like nothing has changed since we last experienced such mundane things.

"Are you going down to the fair in the town?" He asks me on Friday as we're walking back from the lake. In Bjärstad, a carnival fair has arrived, and from the excited hush over it, it seems like the whole school is planning to go on the weekends. All week, that's the only thing anyone's talking about in any conversation one might overhear.

He wants me to come, I realise. "Maybe, why?"

"I don't know," Wilhelm looks away shyly and brushes back his curtains of hair. "I think it'll be cool, though, like the rides would be fun."

"I'm actually slightly terrified of roller coasters," I admit. Ever since I emptied my breakfast on a ride when I was younger, my irrational yet perfectly rational fear looms insistently during events like this.

Wilhelm's grin is full of ideas. "Okay, you have to come now."

"You're not going to force me on a ride, are you?"

"Of course not, I promise."

I glance over at him, and his face is light with laughter and ease. "Maybe, then."

"Come on, it won't be fun without you."

"So you're admitting I'm fun?" I say jokingly, and I dodge as he swats at my head.

Still trying to hit me in the back of the head, Wilhelm fires back: "when have I ever said you weren't?"

I think for a moment, my chest heaving as I run ahead to avoid his attack. "True. Now, will you stop trying to hit me?"

"Don't leave me!" He yells with another laugh, and jogs to catch up to me.

***

It pours that night, not the light sprinkling of humid summer rain, but a heavy thunderstorm that started just before dinner. We file into the dining room as the rain drummed solidly against the roof of Forest Ridge hall, and candles are lit, casting a homey ambience.

Wilhelm and I find a spot nearing the end of the table, and once again, I see August's concerned face staring at us for a split second before turning back to entertain his friends. Pressing my lips together, feelings resembling hatred washes over me regarding what he did to us.

"This is so good," Wilhelm exclaims across from me as he takes a bite from his plate.

I grin. "What a perfect end to the week, huh?"