Tam Riddle: Sometimes the Hero Doesn't Win (HP Fanfic)

Not Mine to Love

Eventually I started to get tired and my bed was calling out for me. Classes started again in the morning and it was already midnight by the time I made my way back to the common room.

I was about to walk around the corner leading to the stairs down to the dungeons, when I heard footsteps approaching me. I recognized the pattern of the strides and the clicking of the shoes. I slipped back into the shadows, pressing my back against the wall as he turned the corner and walked just inches in front of me.

Holding my breath, I stared at him. He stopped and turned to look over his shoulder. Maybe he heard me coming, maybe he heard me breathing, or maybe he heard my heart beat faster and louder. Well, whatever it was that gave me away, he turned and looked at me, looked me dead in the eyes. I could feel my eyes grow large as he continued to stare at me.

And for the first time that day, I saw how broken he looked, or maybe it was just the moonlight. No it was him, no trick of the light, nothing. Just him.

His eyes, silver in the moonlight, went sad and he just looked worn out and tired. But it didn't last long, as he quickly picked himself back up and turned on his heels, leaving me in the shadows alone.

I should have followed him. I should have talked to him. I should have noticed it before. I should have, but I didn't. He was in desperate need of a friend, and here I was spilling his drink on him. I am a horrible person. I deserve to be alone. I don't deserve someone as special as Draco. I wasn't the friend that he needed, nor will I ever be.

By the time I made it back to the common room, it was almost one in the morning. I snuck in and slinked my way back to my room, passing snores and sleep-talking conversations, trying not to wake any of them. I opened my door and slowly closed it shut. I changed and went to bed.

The next day, I awoke to the sun shining in my face. I got up and stretched. It felt absolutely lovely. I looked at my clock.

"CRAP!!!" it read 10:32 am. "I freaking slept through two damn classes!!!" I sprang out of bed and rushed to the bathroom. I took a quick shower and dried my hair and threw on a clean set of uniforms. I gathered my books and flew out the door. I was halfway to my next class, D. A. D. A., when I heard my stomach growl at me.

"Shut up!" I said as I ran down three flights of stairs, taking three steps at a time. "You should have woken me up sooner if you wanted food." I ran as if my life depended on it, and in the case that it was Snape teaching the class, it kinda was. Unfortunately, by the time I reached out to open the door handle, the bell rang and class was over. The door flew open and people started rushing out going to meet their friends and walk to their next class, all happily chattering away.

"Hey, Tammy," I heard a familiar voice say behind me.

"Blaise," I said as I turned to face him.

"Where were you?" he said as he came over, books tucked into his arms. "You missed the first two classes of the day."

"No kidding," I said as I rubbed my eyes and started off to Potions.

"We have a lot of homework to do tonight," he said.

"Oh great, just what we need on the first day back," I said with a frown on my face. We walked all the way back to where I had just come from. The long run, for nothing. We got in and sat down at our usual desks. The bell rang and Professor Slughorn started with our lesson.

"Hey, did you happen to see Draco in the common room when you left," Blaise whispered as the Professor was talking about another dangerous potion we would be making today.

"Uh, no," I said. "I flew out of there so fast; I didn't notice anything but the door. Why?"

"He wasn't at breakfast and he's not in class," he said. I turned to look around the room.

"Ms. Riddle," Professor Slughorn said, my head snapped back around to the front. "Is there something the matter?"

I shook my head, "No Professor," I said as a couple seventh year Hufflepuffs sniggered from across the room. I turned and gave them the deadliest glare I could muster up, they fell instantly silent. I turned back around and a small smile formed on my face.

I put my head down as he continued about the lesson. No, Draco was not in class. So where was he?

Classes ended for the day and we finished eating dinner without seeing Draco and we headed back to the common room. Upon entering the room, we heard footsteps approaching. 

I turned and Alex wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly.

"Hey, Beautiful," he said as he kissed my cheek. When his lips touched my skin and his warm body pressed against mine, I felt light and happy. I smiled a small smile and kissed him on the cheek.

"Hey," I said. "What are you doing down here?"

"I haven't seen you all day," he said, his face getting pouty, it was adorable. "I didn't know you had advanced classes," a disappointed look crossed his face.

"I know, I should have told you," I said. I didn't get to finish because around the corner came the boy I wanted to see all day, my heart beat faster, and I lost my train of thought.

Draco's POV

I had important things to do tonight. I went straight to the common room to change out of the now soiled clothes I had on because of Tammy. What a bitch.

I changed and waited. Waited for everyone to go to sleep. I went back out of my room to the common room around eleven; there were still a couple more people around. I waited for what seemed like forever, until they all drifted off to sleep.

I stood up and walked out the door. It was after midnight, I was making good time. I turned the corner out of the dungeons. I walked past a window and into an area where the shadows lingered across the corridor. I could feel eyes on me. I stood there silently. I could hear a faint thudding sound that was beating really fast. As strange as it was, I knew that sound, I knew it from anywhere. I can't explain how I know, but she was there looking at me. I turned and I estimated the sound and her height and looked, I guess, straight into her eyes.

Her heart started to race, it was so loud that the sound filled the corridor. I wanted so desperately to reach out to her and listen to it. I wanted so desperately to go over there and hold her, touch her, kiss her. But I was torn in two. My mission could not wait any longer. She, on the other hand, would have to.

I decided to leave her there and continued on my way. When I turned the corner I let out a breath I didn't even realize I was holding.

I stayed out almost all night. I came back just before the sun started to rise. I'd tell you what I did, but then I'd have to kill you.

I went to sleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. When I woke up, it was 7:48 pm. I missed dinner, actually I missed everything. I got up showered and changed. I decided to go down to the kitchen. I found out how to get there when I followed those two red-headed twats my second year.

I got food and ate there. I saw Dobby over in the corner, his head down. He didn't want to acknowledge me and I didn't want to acknowledge him. Damn Potter.

I finished and left without saying thank you or anything, rude I know, but that's just how I am.

When I reached the corner just before the common room, I heard her voice, it made my heart skip a beat and do two back flips. But when I turned the corner, my heart sank and almost stopped. She was in the arms of that Alex kid.

I stood there and stared at her. Blaise and Alex turned to look at me. I started forward and shoved my way in between Alex and Tammy to get to the door. When I walked past her, her heart flew a mile a minute, but when I kept walking, I could almost hear her heart slowed down and barely beat at all. I could almost hear it breaking.

It's amazing how much you can finally love someone, care about someone, and feel so greatly about someone, when they aren't yours to love anymore. I never knew what I had, until I lost it.