Tam Riddle: Sometimes the Hero Doesn't Win (HP Fanfic)

Dirty and Unwanted

Author Note: I completely changed the direction of this chapter. At first it was supposed that Tammy had consented to sexual intercourse with Alex, but now it's far from consent. Remember, consent is super important. If consent isn't given willingly and soberly, it's not consent, it's rape. Stay safe and keep aware, my lovely dears.

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Only one other time in my life. This one time, this it was...different. I was so terrified out of my mind, I was frozen with fear.

He came at me. As soon as he touched me, I felt the weight of the body-bind curse lift. I tried to push him off of me, but he just pinned my arms to the ground. I screamed but he covered my mouth and grabbed bra and shoved it in my mouth to gag me. He had then proceeded to have his way with my body. I was crying throughout the entire ordeal.

I'm so stupid. I could have just knocked him off me with a blast of wind, I could have burned his hand. But I didn't . I didn't because I was scared. I was so afraid of what he was doing.

I was now lying naked on the ground in the fetal position. I was silently crying about what had happened. I felt so dirty and used. I heard Alex stand up and begin to put his clothes back on.

"You're now dirty and unwanted," he sneered at me. "You're nothing but a filthy whore," he said in disgust as he left the room.

I began sobbing loudly. I can't tell Draco what happened. I can't let him see me like this. My body felt sore all over. I sat up slowly and my head began spinning again. I slowly picked myself up off the floor and looked for my clothes.

He had thrown my clothes all over the place. I picked up my blouse and realized I couldn't wear it anymore. When he came at me, he tore it off my body. There were no longer any buttons on it. I sighed and choked back a sob. I glanced back at where I had been lying on the ground and saw three small drops of blood. I shut my eyes.

I had never felt so pathetic and useless in my entire life. I thought I was stronger, but this...how could I even go against Voldemort if I can't even stand up against an angsty, psychotic teenage boy?

I put on my clothes and glanced around the room. Something caught my eye on the dusty, old piano. I walked over and bundled up on the bench was Alex's jacket. I had no choice but to use it.

I put it on and slowly made my way out of the shack and through the tunnel. When I exited the tunnel, the tree didn't attack me. Maybe it knew what had happened to me. Maybe it didn't want to hurt me.

I slowly made my way back to the Slytherin common room. I wonder how long I was down there. I wonder if anyone missed me.

When I got into the Entrance Hall, I stopped a passing first year Slytherin and asked him what day it was.

"Um, Sunday," he said as he looked at me kind of weird. I must look like crap. I've been out there for at least one whole day. I missed all of Saturday and Friday evening. Draco...he must be so worried about me.

I passed the Great Hall. It was lunchtime, I could hear my stomach growling, but I couldn't possibly eat right now. I passed the Hall and continued on my way down to the Slytherin common room.

"Pureblood," I said softly. The door opened and I stepped through. I made my way to my room past gossiping gangs scattered across the common room.

I finally got to my room. When I closed my door, I was suddenly ambushed. A pair of strong arms snatched me up into a hug.

"Tammy!"

"Draco?" I asked as I tried to get my anxiety under control. "You scared me. What are you doing here?" I said as he pulled away. He looked at me and something changed on his face.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "You look like you've been crying." Concern laced his voice and spread across his face.

I immediately looked away. "I'm fine," I said quietly. I felt his fingers under my chin as he made me look at him.

"No you're not," he said as he looked me in the eyes, "you've been gone since Friday evening. Where have you been?"

I averted my eyes. I don't want him to know what happened to me. I can't let him know what Alex did to me. "I'm sorry," I said as I tried not to cry. He tried to get me to look at him but I began shaking my head and pulled away from him. 

"Tammy?" he said softly. "It's okay if you don't want to tell me, but I'm here for you and I don't want to push you into telling me, but whenever you're ready, I'll be here to listen okay?" I weakly nodded my head as I went over to my bed and laid down on it. He came in on the other side and held me in his arms.

Oh Draco. You're too good for me. I'm a terrible person and you deserve so much better than me.

"Hey, who's jacket is this?" he asked as he started picking at the jacket sleeve. My eyes went wide. I sat straight up a little too fast and I became lightheaded again.

"N-no one's," I said a little too quickly. "Um it's a friend's and I was just borrowing it. I should return it but I need to shower first, okay?" I said quickly as I got up and started getting my things to shower. He narrowed his eyes at me and I avoided his gaze.

I ran into the bathroom and shut the door. I got ready to bathe. I looked at my underwear and there was a little blood on it. I closed my eyes and threw it away. It was an unwanted reminder of what had happened. I let the tub fill up before sitting inside and scrubbing my body completely as if I could wash away how filthy I felt.

"I came to your room on Friday to tell you something," Draco said from the other side of the door. "But when I got here, you weren't around so I thought perhaps you went to dinner. I had gone downstairs, but I didn't see you. Come to think of it, I didn't see Keynes either," he said thoughtfully.

"It must have just been a coincidence. I was in the library Friday night, you can ask Pansy if you want, but I had her leave early so she could talk to Theo," I said trying not to sound nervous.

"Hm," he said. "Well anyway, when I didn't see you at breakfast, I thought you might have been busy and so I went back to work," he said. "I went to your room again yesterday morning after breakfast. I thought you might have been in that morning because your things were on your bed, but no one knew where you had gone."

I was washing my hair now. Trying to get all the knots out. My things were back in my room? Maybe Alex asked Pansy to bring my stuff to my room?

"I waited all day for you, but you didn't come back," he said sadly. "Where were you yesterday?"

What should I say to him? That I didn't know where I was, that Alex had kidnapped me? What should I tell him? I stayed quiet. I heard him sigh.

"Tammy?" he asked and waited for me to answer.

"Yes, Draco?" I said in return.

"Will you be my girlfriend?" he asked.