Lacuna (Book two to Attraction)

3.

I don't think I can wait any longer, I need to give Paul his clothes back and I need to get my clothes back from his house. This would feel like some pathetic excuse to see him if I weren't going during his work hours, this is such an uncomfortable deja vu feeling for me right now. While I steadily drive my car down the familiar gravel road, the radio softly plays—Thankfully there aren't any break up songs on the radio right now.

The house is quiet and looks peaceful from the outside when I pull up in the not so empty driveway, Paul's car is here which isn't what I was expecting at all. A large breath is sucked into my lips as I open my car door, I can't just drive away and wait until he's gone—That would be something the old me would have done, I want to handle things differently now. My hands clutch onto the few shirts of his that I found in my room, as I walk closer to the front door I am hesitant to knock for a moment before I push through the uncomfortable feeling.

When the front door opens my eyes meet with the brown eyes I've deeply longed for, the brown eyes that cause my knees to become weak despite my strength. My eyes study his features, his facial hair is now a rough stubble and I can tell he hasn't shaved in a few days at least. He looks surprised to see me, I don't think he was expecting this either, his lips part while I listen to the sound of his rapidly growing heartbeat.

"Willow?" He whispers in disbelief.

His gaze scans me, he looks like he's trying to decide if I'm real or not. I need to speak and say something but I can't but I can't just stay silent. The frown on my face forms when I remember our last encounter and how hurt I was when the truth came out. Suddenly all of my guilt for leaving is blown away by anger and pain, he lied.

"Don't look at me like that..." He begs weakly.

"I wanted to bring you your things, I also wanted to come get anything I left here." My voice sounds cold and emotionless but I don't care right now.

Paul moves out of the doorway while I walk inside feeling a stem of confidence growing inside of me. When I turn to face him his eyes are roaming my face with worry in them, he looks like he has so many things to say but I don't want to hear them, a frown forms on his face.

"We need to talk about what happened before you left Forks." He states calmly, it irritates me at how calm he sounds.

"There's no point." I respond before turning around to walk away.

"Willow, stop it." He sounds stern as my irritation grows.

Does he really think he can turn this around on me? Of course I left, I was fed up. My heels stop as I slowly turn around to face him. "We need to talk about this"

"Oh, do we?" My voice is laced with sarcasm, Paul sighs and runs a hand through his silky dark hair.

"Don't do this." He pleas with me.

"No, you don't do this. You lost the right to talk to me after you decided to lie to me for who knows how long." I retort before turning on my heels while swiftly walking into his room.

The sound of his heavy footsteps can be heard behind me.

"You don't even know what happened." He snaps, "Maybe if you'd quit running away every time something happens between us you would actually be able to hear the truth."

I clench my jaw at his words before turning to face him. How dare he say that to me, he has got to be joking right now.

"What?" I mutter.

"You heard me. You run away almost every time something happens between us. I get that I lied to you and you have every right to be upset at me over that but you don't even give me a chance to explain. I at least deserve that much." He says.