On Top [H.S.]

Chapter 61

Harry's POV

The last few days have been a rollercoaster of emotions.

Ava and Wendy left a couple days ago and it's been about a week since Lia's been released from the hospital. They both wanted to stay longer, worried about how Lia was going to hold up, but both of their lives didn't allow them to. Wendy had to get back to work and Ava kept getting calls from my parents asking when she would be coming back — often resulting in her cutting the phone on them.

That's my fucking sister.

It was hard to watch Lia say goodbye to Wendy. It was obvious that Wendy didn't want to leave her, she was her only daughter who had just gone through something so fucking terrible. I could only watch in sadness as Lia hugged her tightly, crying into her shoulder with her face buried into her neck.

I hated that this was a recurring thing, especially for her. I know Lia loves her mom so much and it breaks me into pieces to see them have to part every so often. I was the same way with Ava so I knew exactly what she was going through. Seeing Ava cry always makes me fucking cry too, and no matter how many times we say goodbye to each other, it still hurts just as much as the time before.

I count my lucky fucking stars though when it comes to Ave, we both finally have the freedom to contact each other whenever we please. I can't believe there was a time in my life where I couldn't call or text her whenever the fuck I wanted to.

After they both left is when things got even harder for Lia. The last few nights have been tough for her and I just wish there was something I could do to help her, to erase everything that she's been through because she didn't deserve it at all.

She's the last person to deserve something like this.

We both go to bed together, tangled in the sheets with my arms wrapped around her, and everything is okay when we do. I whisper sweet and loving words in her ear, peppering kisses under her ear and telling her how much I love her. She falls asleep in my arms so peacefully, but it's during the middle of the night that she's jolting up, sitting straight up in bed in total fear.

I remember the first night she did it. I was terrified. She broke free from my arms with a yell and was sitting up when I woke up only to see her staring straight ahead, harsh and shaky breaths leaving her lips. The clock read three in the morning as I immediately shot up and placed my hand on her shoulder, making her flinch before turning to look at me.

"Baby, are you okay?" I quietly asked and she sniffled, indicating that she had been crying. "No...." she trailed off, throwing my arm around her shoulder and hauling herself into my body. I shifted myself back so I was leaning against the headboard and maneuvered her so her body fit right in between my spread legs.

I could feel her shaking against my body, her hands fisting the fabric of my sweats as she sobbed into my neck and I felt her pain run through me, as if I was the one going through what she was. If I could, I would take all of it away in a heartbeat, letting myself be the one to endure it because my Lia didn't deserve it. She deserves happiness, she deserves to be loved and cherished.

She deserves nothing but the fucking best.

"You're okay, you're okay." I softly repeated, tightening my grip around her shoulder. My hands brushed over her shoulder, tickling against the skin there as her shirt loosely fell off, showcasing a sliver of her soft skin that I loved to touch so much. "You're safe with me. I promise nothing will happen to you."

I swallowed tightly as I said those words to her, and I felt the guilt rush through my body. Safe. I was supposed to keep her safe and I fucking failed. I was a coward who couldn't do anything about Denver and Victor before they got to Lia and they took my biggest weakness and used it against me. I thought about this too much over the last week, how I've failed so many people around me. I lost so many people in my life — important people whom I'm never going to get back — and I couldn't help but to think that it was all because of me.