the boy under the moonlight|| TRASH OF THE COUNT'S FAMILY||

the parting Part 5

Just like that, days turned into week and week into month and with that the season changed. Summer came to an end and it was the start of fall. Most of the leaves had already started to turn yellow as they fell from the trees and with a new gust of wind, Autumn was here.

"Hey Cale! The leaves on the garden trees have started to turn yellow, you wanna go stroll around the garden? It looks pretty" Alberu asked as he held Cale's weak hands.

It had been a month since Alberu came to this village and a month since he met Cale. Cale, now looked more and more pale and weak to the point that sometimes he wouldn't even have the strength to get up by himself. Somedays he would forget about what he was doing and stay in bed staring at a wall for more than an hour to the point he wouldn't even notice Alberu's presence. Somedays he would throw temper tantrums, his emotional outburst would get worst. But in every situation, Alberu had been there with him and for him because this all Alberu could do for him now.

"Maybe ... later" a weak reply came from Cale's trembling mouth

"It's alright. We can just go there anytime we want" Alberu gently stroked Cale's hair as he laid Cale down so he could get some rest.

"Hyung" Cale called out to Alberu with his voice so faint that it almost sounded like a whisper.

"Yes, I am here" Alberu answered his call in a very gentle voice

"I am sorry... because of me you won't be able to keep you promise" Cale said with a quivering voice.

"Hey hey why would you say that. I will keep that promise, you'll see"

"I... see"

"Yes, so you don't need to apologize"

"Hyung... are you there?" Cale vision was getting blurry, his eyes felt tired. But no matter how tired he felt, sleep never came to him easily

"Yes, I am here" Alberu grabbed Cale's hand to assure him that he was here

"I ... am kind of feeling sleepy"

"Then you should rest" Alberu tried laying Cale down on his bed

Cale wrapped his arms around Alberu because of which he could feel Cale's weak breathing. It was so weak that Alberu couldn't even tell if he really was breathing.

"Thank you Hyung" Cale whispered in Alberu's ears.

Alberu didn't say anything and just hugged him tightly as he slowly put him in bed.

"Good night Cale"

"Alberu-nim I think you should-"

"shhh"

Choi Han was shushed before he could say anything. Alberu gestured him to be quite so Choi Han slowly walked towards Alberu and said what he had come to say.

"I think you should go back too. I'll take care of him. You have been here for too long; you need to get some fresh air"

"No, I am alright, I think I will spend the night here."

"Again?"

"I am sorry I know its troublesome but I want to be by his side as much as I can"

"I understand. I will let doctor Rosalyn know; she is also worried about you"

"Thank you, Choi Han."

***********************

Alberu felt a gentle stroke on his head that woke him up. He didn't even realize that he had fallen asleep beside Cale's bed.

"I am sorry, did I wake you up?" Alberu heard a quiet voice as he no longer felt the hand that was stroking his head.

"No, it's alright. When did you get up?" Alberu asked rubbing his still sleepy eyes

"I never slept" the reply came almost instantly

"I'm sorry"

"Why do you always keep apologizing like this?"

".. just cause"

"it's not like any of this is your fault"

Alberu didn't say anything, he just got up and gulped down the water that was kept on the bed side table as he watched Cale stare outside the window

"The moon isn't visible today. That sucks" Cale said in a regretful voice.

"It is pretty cloudy tonight"

"I saw my mother in my dream when I nodded off for a few moments"

Alberu put the water bottle down and looked at Cale.

"How was she?" alberu asked before even realizing the weight of those words carried. He hurriedly added "ah I... I am sorry... I didn't mean to-" but he was cut off

"My mother died when I was very young" Cale did not move his eyes away from the window and continued "She was also weak, very weak. The doctors were actually surprised that she was even able to give birth to me. But she did, she believed in herself. That's why she may have been physical weak but mentally she was the strongest women I knew. But when I showed symptoms of the same weaknesses as her, she broke. Every day she blamed herself that made her health even worse, seeing that..." Cale's lips trembled as he continued "it broke my heart, she was so strong but... I ... broke her. She used to apologize to me every day, whenever I used to get sick, she was always the one to cry and apologize. You know what her last words were when she died Hyung?"

"......" Alberu stayed silent, he couldn't get any words out of his mouth.

As Alberu silently watched Cale's small back that never once turned around, because of which Alberu couldn't see what kind of expression Cale had on his face but he could pretty much guess it because he too, knew what it felt like to helplessly watch your mother dying in front of you at such a young age. Alberu could see Cale's hand tremble as Cale continued to speak after a moment of silence.

"She said 'I am sorry, it's my fault that you are suffering so much my child' these were her exact words as her body turned cold and I just stood there silently. I wanted to say it wasn't her fault, I wanted to say that I was glad she gave birth to me... but no words came out of my mouth"

Cale finally turned to look at Alberu. He looked like he was on the verge of breaking down. Alberu walked towards Cale, opening his arms, he pulled Cale in his embrace. That was all he could do for him from the very start. That was all.

Cale sniffled and continued to speak "But you know Hyung at some point, I stopped caring whether I lived or died. I used to be so afraid of death. Sometimes my mother's face on her last moments haunted me and I didn't know why. Was it regret? Regret that I couldn't tell her it was okay? Would she have been able to rest in peace after that? So many questions I used to ask myself every day but these days they don't come to me as much as they did. It's weird but there is something else that scares me more now" Cale looked up at Alberu's face and gave him a faint smile

"Wanna know what I think about these days? What I fear more than dying?"

Alberu just looked at Cale with confused expression when he finally managed to get one word out of his mouth "what?" Alberu asked in response to Cale's question.

Cale smiled again and buried his face on Alberu's chest as he responded, "I am afraid that in the last moment of my life, as I take my last breath, I won't recognize you just like that day on the beach. I don't want that." Cale buried his face even deeper. Alberu could feel something cold in his chest. He hugged Cale even tighter when he realized what that cold and wet feeling on his chest was. It was Cale's tears that wet his shirt as the sniffing turned into weeping.

"Shh it's alright Cale, it's alright. I will be here no matter what. I will be here, even if you can't recognize me one day, I will still hold you just like this. Even if you push me away, I will wait, wait until you call for me again" Alberu slowly lifted Cale's chin with his fingers, gave him a gentle smile and added "so it's alright" as he wiped Cale's tears and kissed his forehead.

"You really are so very kind Hyung. I don't think I deserve someone like you in my life"