Never Enough Winstons |The Outsiders|

Grief

Dallas loved being right. He loved being able to prove that he was right, and they were wrong.

But Dallas didn't like being right about Hannah.

Ever since he was young, Dallas feared the day he would eventually become his father. He never thought he'd see the day Hannah became their mother.

He should've been keeping a close eye on her, he knew that. But Hannah was eighteen, wasn't she old enough to watch out for herself?

Besides, Hannah had her own life now, surely she wouldn't want her older brother around all the time.

Dallas didn't worry about her, he had no reason to.

After graduation, the gang grew apart. There was no fighting or tearful goodbyes, one day Hannah and Dallas passed the Curtis house and felt no need to go inside. The world had moved on, and so would they.

Hannah enjoyed her freedom, and Dallas liked watching his sister be happy. She was a greaser through and through, who drank and smoked, swore and fought, wore too much makeup and slept with too many strangers. She had a cool mind, a fearsome temper, and an even colder heart. On top of it all, Hannah held a record that rivalled her brother's.

Dallas wasn't concerned. She always came back to Buck's after a few days, and never seemed to get into any fight she couldn't handle. Dallas wasn't worried about her, he was proud.

Then one day Hannah came out of her bedroom and Dallas couldn't recognize her.

Her hair faded out to ginger like it always did in the autumn months, that didn't bother him. He didn't care about the smeared mascara or lipstick on her cheek, or the fact that she was still wearing her dress from the night before.

The last time he saw her, when she was nine years old, Hannah's pale eyes still held a spark. An innocent hope for a better tomorrow. When she came to Tulsa, the spark had disappeared. It had taken eleven weeks until he saw even the tiniest glimmer in her eyes.

The spark hadn't disappeared now, it had died.

Hannah looked too tired for eighteen. She had barely lived at all, and the few broken pieces of her heart were now damaged beyond repair.

The cold facade she wore had finally broken. She passed her brother without a word and stared out the window silently. It didn't feel like her heart was beating. It didn't feel like she was alive at all. Hannah had felt like this too many times before. This time, she feared she wouldn't be strong enough to fight back.

Dallas remembered the day the light in Verna's eyes went out. It was right after Charlie beat him for the first time. That's when Verna realized Charlie would never love her, his children, or the life they built together.

Dallas and Hannah ran off that night, a bag of fast food and overwhelming silence between them.

The wind howled outside the car as Dallas turned onto a dirt road, Hannah watched the stars soundlessly. They drove on for a few more miles before the car lurched forwards and came to a stop.

"Talk to me, kid."

She took a shallow breath, the most noise she made in over three days. "Ain't nothing to talk about."

This wasn't right. Her voice was much too quiet to be Hannah's.

Too tired. Too scared.

Hannah picked at the fries Dallas handed her cautiously, her empty blue eyes still facing the dark sky. Her brother sighed in his seat, not believing her lie for even a second.

"You look a lot like Verna when you pull this shit," he snapped suddenly. Hannah swallowed the lump in her throat with difficulty. This seemed to anger Dallas further.

"Dammit, Hannah, just fucking look at me!"

Dallas had already lost his mother, he'd be damned if he had to lose his sister, too.

Their eyes finally met. The identical hatred they once held for the world had since vanished.

"I guess this is it," she sighed tiredly. "This is the rest of my life."

Hannah interrupted before he even had a chance to speak.

"I can never have kids because I'm gonna fuck them up, probably even worse than Verna did us," she weaved her hands through her hair while taking a breath.

"An' I broke up with the only guy whose ever said he loved me and meant it."

Dallas rested his hand on her shoulder as her eyes found the sky once more. A stray tear made its way down her cheek as Hannah took another shallow breath. "I'm real fucked up, Dal. I dunno what I'm doing."

A small laugh escaped his lips. "I don't think any of us know what we're doing, kid."

Even though she was turned away, Dallas knew she was rolling her eyes.

"But that doesn't mean you gotta do everything alone. I meant it when I said I wasn't gonna leave you."

The tiniest smile tugged at her own lips as Hannah turned to face her brother. "Y'know what? Fuck Verna. Fuck Charlie, too. I hate them all."

Dallas laughed.

"I know I said I forgave 'er and all that shit, but what she did was so fucked up, and I will hate her forever."

Dallas chuckled at the determined look on his sister's face. As the night grew older, he took a sip of his coke and turned his face towards the sky. "Fuck you, Verna!"

It wasn't long before Hannah did the same, and the two spent the night yelling at the sky, and the people who hurt them.

Three days passed since the midnight escape into the backroads of Oklahoma, and Hannah had yet to return to her normal self.

Then one day, as she passed him in the hall, he saw it.

The tiniest glimmer of hope in her eye.

Leave me your comments, questions or requests!

And let me know what you would prefer for the final chapter, a happy ending, or more angst!

Love ya! <3