sweatshirts in the summertime| l.mh /ft. p.js

chapter 17

"So what happened with you and Jisung?" Lia asks me. We're in class but we have a substitute teacher. "He said some things he didn't mean because he was still upset about Chae. He apologized though and I forgave him" I explain to her. "That's good. I was worried when you wanted to leave so early. Mark told me what you guys did after you left."

"What?" I'm confused. What did he tell her? "He just said you two went and got pizza. He was really excited that you like the same type of pizza he does." I breath a sigh of relief. I thought he told her about us exchanging confessions. "Oh and one more thing, he told me that you two like each other." She said with a smirk. My face is burning.

"Well, you see uh" I struggle to find words. "Anjae, I'm not blind or dumb. You guys make it so obvious." She says amused by my dumbfounded state. I go to speak but I'm saved by the bell. "Time for lunch!" I exclaim dragging Lia to the door.

We get our lunch and sit at the table. Mark has this lunch wave with us but he's late today. My phone starts ringing. It's my mom? That's odd. She normally doesn't call me while I'm at school. I pick up the phone since I'm at lunch. "Hello?"

She doesn't speak. I hear her whimper and sniffle. "Mom? Mom?! What's wrong?" Lia looks up at my worried face. "Jae... it's your father..." my heart sinks. "No..." "He's gone" she bursts into tears. "Mom! No! You're lying to me. Please tell me your lying." My voice breaks as I shout in denial. This can't be true. "I'm sorry Anjae, it was a car accident."

The news is all so sudden. I'm so lost I don't even hear my mom hang up the phone. I'm staring down at my lap. "Anjae... are you ok?" Lia asks me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I don't respond. I can't move. My body feels numb. I start shaking and a tear rolls down my cheek. I get up from the table and run out of the cafeteria.

As I'm running I bump into someone. He grabs me and holds me. "Hey... what's wrong." His soft voice says. My tears stain his shirt and my breath hitches. He pulls me away from him to look at my face. "Anjae, what happened" Mark exclaims worriedly. At this I burst into tears. They don't stop flowing, getting heavier and heavier. Mark takes me into an empty classroom and sits down on the floor next to me.

"Mark, it's my dad. He died in a car accident." I say through sobs. Mark's expression softens and his heart drops. "Anjae...I'm so sorry" he says pulling me into his embrace. He glides his hands across my back. I clench his shirt tight, trying to control my emotions. "It's ok, let it out." He says and I listen. I had never been this heartbroken in my life.

"My dad was my best friend and now he's gone." I can barely believe it. Part of me still doesn't want to believe it. "I can sorta relate. My dad died while my mom was still pregnant with me. I didn't really know how to feel because I had never met him. My mom married Lia's dad a year later. That's why me and Lia have different last names." I always wondered that but I never wanted to ask.

"Thank you. For staying with me. I didn't need to be alone." I say gratefully to him. My eyes feel so heavy and they're still red and puffy. I go and find Lia to tell her what happened. She almost bursts into tears which causes me to cry again. "I'm so sorry Anjae!" She says pulling me into a tight hug. We cry in each other's arms for a bit. We separate from each other at the sound of the dismissal bell.

I walk home alone today. I need time alone to think. I need to be strong for my mom, I know she's torn apart on the inside. When I walk through the door I see a picture of my dad and a tear rolls down my face. "Mom!" I call weakly. She comes running to me. I'm pulled into a tight hug for the third time today. I return her embrace and let her cry on my shoulders.

After a while, we sit down on the couch. "You can take time off of school if you need to." She says rubbing my knee. "I can't do that mom. Dad wouldn't want me to. I can't get behind on my studies." My dad always stressed to me how important my grades are. Especially this year if I want to get into a good university. "I'll come home immediately everyday after school to help you." My mother gives me a small smile. "Whatever you need to do honey." She taps my thigh before going to bed.

I do the same but I can't sleep. My mother's sobs aren't helping mine. If anything, it's causing me to cry harder. Everything reminds me of him. He was always there for me and he is so important to me. Now he's gone. I keep looking at my bedroom doorway hoping to see his silhouette, hoping he'll come home and make everything better.