Lost in the Depth

Regret

Deep breaths. In. Out. In. Out.

Wiping the last of the blood away, I pull my undies back up and wipe my tears. Staring at myself in the bathroom mirror, I lean my weight on the sink with both my hands. 

Couldn't even fight a captain off you.

If you couldn't beat him, how the fuck are you going to beat Madeline?

I scoff at the pathetic face staring back at me. Turning on the faucet, I splash my face with water before drying it and exiting the bathroom after an eternity.

"That took a-"

"Do you have any.. um- you know..." I interrupt Antonio, in a rush to get out of this godforsaken dress and everything under it.

"No, I don't." He's not mocking. Even he isn't that evil to tease me in my current state. He really just doesn't know.

"Clothes, Antonio."

"Ohh. Yea hold up."

I just stand in the middle of his room as he goes into his walk-in closet. I don't sit because it's still bad down there.

"Catch," Antonio says as he throws a hoodie to me.

"Antonio, I'm not going to wear a hoodie without anything else. If you think this night is going there then I think I'll just leave."

He stands, staring at me in disbelief. Wow, so he's even shocked that I don't want to do it right now.

"What? Rayn-"

"No Antonio, ok? I just don't want to!" Fresh memories of the captain flash in my head.

He reaches for my arm and before I can pull away, he's grabbed me by the shoulders.

"Rayna, I don't-"

"No, let go of me!" He obeys me for once and takes his hands off my shoulders but he still pleads with his eyes for me to look at him.

"Rayna, I don't want to-"

"No! I said I- wait what?"

He looks at me with a sort of sadness in his eyes. But not pity. More like an angry sad.

"God, Rayna, why would you think that after what happened, I'd force you to do anything- or even in general."

"I just- I don't know. I just thought... I don't know," my words come out in an embarrassed mutter as I lower my head. Why would I think that. Antonio isn't even that type of person.

He pulls me in for a tight hug and I rest my face in his chest. "I'm going to find Warner and I'm going to fucking kill him for what he did to you." So that's his name. Well, Tony won't have to worry about killing him, because I'll beat him to it.

"Kill him or don't. I don't care cause I'm fine, ok?"

"Clearly."

Not in the mood to argue, I just sigh into his chest. He pulls away and I grab his arm before he walks away, silently asking to hold me longer.

"I'll be back in a moment."

I let go, and a few seconds later he returns with a pair of black sweatpants in his hand.

I scoff at the sight. "Tony, your sweats are definitely too big for me."

"They're not mine." As I survey them, I realise they're too small to be a man's. They're a girl's.

"Oh my fucking god, I'm not wearing one of your sluts' clothes."

"Jesus Christ Rayna I'm not the fuckboy you think I am."