All This Time

Chapter 9

Ryan and I spent the evening watching the remainder of the race, which had been delayed for a few hours by rain. We ordered pizza and just snuggled and it was honestly the best evening I can ever remember having. We had such a real connection. We were never at a loss for conversation, we finished each other's sentences, and we laughed. Falling in love with one of my best friends was truly the best of both worlds. The making out was pretty damn good too. Our relationship was moving so fast, but maybe we were just making up for lost time because there was no where else in the world I'd rather be than in his arms.

We watched the closing laps of the race on pins and needles as the remaining Team Penske drivers fought it out for the win.

"I love the passion you have for the sport. It's in your blood and it is a part of you as much as it is for me." He said.

"That's because we were born into it. It's what we know." I smiled as I gazed into his blue eyes

"You just get it. You get me. I love you Alayna Brooke."

"I love you too Ryan Michael."

I couldn't take my eyes off of him. He was so gorgeous, and he was here with me. I had a feeling something big was going to happen tonight. Something even bigger than saying 'I love you.' The question was, was I ready for it?

The spell was broken by an alert coming through on his phone. He looked at the text message and frowned.

"Everything okay?" I asked.

"Yeah. It's Katie. She's coming into town Wednesday and wants to get together." He sighed.

"I thought y'all broke up." I said, trying not to freak out over the fact that his ex girlfriend was texting him for probably a hook up. He seemed pretty casual about it, and I wasn't sure if that should worry me or not.

"We did. It was a mutual agreement. I'm going to text her back and tell her I'm not available because I'm with you." He squeezed my hand, and I should have felt better, but I didn't.

I'm usually not that insecure, but something about Katie always made me feel a little unsure of myself. She was tall, model thin and gorgeous. She had traveled the world. She was sophisticated, fluent in many languages and was highly successful. There was no way I even came close to measuring up. Sure I traveled a lot myself....from race track to race track. I wasn't tall and thin and gorgeous. I was short, curvy and cute. I spoke NASCAR...My southern twang making me sound anything but sophisticated. I had always been one of the guys, one that most guys see as a sister. What did Ryan even see in me?

"Okay." I spoke softly, begging my anxiety over Katie not to get the best of me.

"What's wrong baby?" Ryan asked, concern etched on his face.

"Nothing." I lied, forcing a smile. I didn't want him to know how insecure I was feeling at the moment.

"Katie and I are over Laynie. I swear. I haven't talked to her since we broke up. I'm as surprised as you are that she called me. I'm going to tell her about us, I'm not going to meet up with her. I don't even want to. It's you I want." He looked at me with such adoration, that I mentally chided myself for letting my insecurities spoil the moment. I trusted him.

"I'm sorry Ry. I swear I'm not usually this insecure. It's just that...I don't know. She's...she's freaking perfect and I'm....I'm just this." I gestured.

"This. You are beautiful and sweet and exactly what I want in my life. You have no reason to be insecure about Katie." For emphasis, he began typing out a message on his phone, reading it out to me. 'Sorry Katie, I'm not available. I'm with Laynie now."

I smiled, for real this time when he put down his phone.

He leaned in a little closer and pressed his lips to mine. It started off slow, but then intensified as he angled my head to kiss me deeper and I was caught up in the strange sensation of floating, yet falling at the same time. It took me a moment to realize I was now flat on my back and Ryan was hovering above me, his weight slowly settling down until we were flush against each other. That might explain the falling sensation. As his tongue twisted heatedly with mine, my head was spinning and I felt a twinge in the pit of my stomach that was traveling lower and lower, warmth that was growing and spreading throughout my body. I had never been kissed like this in my life, had never felt more alive then I did at this moment.

He lifted the hem of my T-shirt and his soft, warm lips were on my stomach, slowly working higher and higher until they reached the swell of my right breast, peaking out from the cup of my bra. This was the farthest I had gone with anyone, even Erik. He had managed to get his hand under my shirt a few times, and I had panicked each time because I was not ready. I waited for the panicky feeling and uncertainty to hit me, but it didn't. I didn't want him to stop.

Even when he pushed the fabric of my bra to the side, exposing my nipple, I didn't stop him. I wanted more. When he wrapped his lips around the perked bud, a jolt of pleasure went straight to my inner thighs, my clit pulsing in response. I still wanted more. I nearly whined when he pulled himself off of my breast, but then he released the front clasp of my bra, leaving my upper body completely exposed. I still didn't feel the slightest bit of uncertainty.

"Is this okay?" His raspy voice asking the question caught me by surprise, and all I could do was nod. The fact that he was asking if I was okay before going any further lit a fire in me. I had never felt so treasured. I needed to tell him I had never gone this far with anyone before, but I couldn't make myself speak. I was afraid that my lack of experience would be a turn off, and was a little embarrassed over being a twenty seven year old virgin.

He lowered his head and lavished my left breast with the same attention he had given to the right, and I felt as if I was burning from the inside, a fire that he had ignited, and all I could think was I wanted even more. I wanted him to feed that fire, turn it into an inferno that would burn on and on until he extinguished it. Frankly though, I didn't want it extinguished anytime soon.

I threaded my fingers through his thick hair, holding his head against my breast. He finally lifted his head and stared into my eyes. "You are so damn beautiful Alayna Brooke. The use of my given name had never sounded as sweet as it did coming from his lips. He then pressed those lips to mine in a breath stealing kiss.

"I want you to be my first." I said, as soon as he broke free of the kiss.