"Niko," I whisper, reaching for his arm. As my fingers flutter over his sleeve he freezes, turning his gaze slowly back to me.
I've seen every guise he's ever used, every mask he's worn to court and with his crew, each personality more intriguing than the last. But none of them compare to the hope I see shining in his eyes now, intoxicatingly bright.
"I could never hate you, not then and certainly not now." The words are a breath. I cringe, despising the vulnerability in my voice. Still, I continue, "I hated that you left and I hated that I missed you and most of all I hated that I needed you. But I never hated you."
Tentatively I slip my hand into his and squeeze, surprised when the touch doesn't send shivers across my nerves. Nikolai seems just as shocked before he squeezes my hand back.
"If I hug you, you won't punch me again right?"
I let out a small, wet laugh, not realizing until then that the tears are now streaming down my cheeks. They're not of sadness, but of relief. To finally have my friend back, to finally feel safe again.
Quickly, I wipe them on the back of my free hand, "No, I won't."
Nikolai wraps an arm around my shoulders, pulling me toward him. From our seated position I can't lean against him but his forehead rests against mine, creating our own world in the inches between us. There's no stench of wine, no unwanted shiver of touch, no pulse pounding in my ears. Just him.
"You are my best friend Kora." His voice washes over me like sea foam, soft and cool, "You deserved a better goodbye than the one I gave you."
I nod against him, not able to muster an ounce of anger anymore. Everything, all the fear of the past weeks, has been alleviated. Nikolai was the only place I ever felt safe. I forgot how much I depended on the boy who could take the weight of the world from my shoulders, if only for a moment.
"You know what," Nikolai pulls back. His signature smirk has returned in full force. On the spindly boy I knew it was a show, too cocky for the frame he had yet to grow into. This time it's different, the cool charm of it makes my heart flutter, "I should have guessed you were a Squaller, you always were a bit of an airhead."
"That's so not true." I laugh, grinning in the way that only Nikolai can make me. If anyone else tried to make a joke now I would be appalled, but Nikolai always seems to know just how to bring me out of my own head.
"And what about you," I challenge, "You're supposed to be off at school. Though I don't suppose you ever stay where you're supposed to."
"Ah, you know me so well," He tips his head, the easy confidence washing back over him though I notice his hand lingering on mine for another moment before he pulls away, "School is boring. I'd much rather be out here, actually doing something, helping the country."
"Being a Pirate?" I raise an eyebrow, tucking my knees against my chest.
"Again Privateer, I work for Ravka."
"Ah, so it's not that big of a career change." I tease, resting my chin atop my knees. It's so easy to talk to him, even with the years separating us. Despite the time and the miles of sea that have come between us, I can still see the six-year-old who hoisted me onto his back to watch the Grisha examiners, who laughed at my terrible attempt at a curtsy, who kept all my secrets.
"You though, you have changed quite a bit, haven't you. The way you lied," Nikolai's smile turns devious and he shakes his head in awe, "You've become quite cunning. It's your bad luck you ran into me, otherwise, I have no doubt you could have lied your way to Novyi Zem."
YOU ARE READING
Tempest and Tide [Nikolai Lantsov]
Fanfiction"Don't look so shocked, I'm nothing if not a negotiator," The privateer grins, tapping his chin in a mockery of thought, "Though I do so love exceeding people's expectations, so I suppose a bit of shock is inevitable." ~~~ childhood friends | stra...