sociopath [yeonbin]

ten

i'm so hot, i ignite
dancing in the dark and i shine
like a light i'm luring you
▪︎▪︎▪︎

having his lunch alone, he sighed. clearly, he wasn't going through a great time staying at home with his anxieties. he has always tended to overthink everything and after finding a wiretap in his pocket and then even wireless hidden cameras all over their apartment, how could he expect himself to stay calm?

he thought too many times about confronting yeonjun about it but what if yeonjun might just throw a fit after hearing him?

a doubt, against his consent, has been sown deep inside of him because of the wiretap and he found himself checking all the rooms with a pretence of searching for something that he lost. obviously, he won't make it obvious that he found out the hidden cameras afterwards.

the more he thinks about it, the more he feels sick of everything. but he can't seem to just ignore it and act as if nothing happened.

drinking a glass of water, he stopped continuing his lunch as he couldn't just eat after all these. that too infront of hidden cameras but he needed to carry on the show. he choked on his water, suffocation and toxicity gagging him. he strangled a sob and ran to his bathroom.

searching the bathroom thoroughly, he heaved a sigh of relief when he didn't find any cams there. that's when, he allowed his mental breakdown to take its place as tears kept rolling down his  cheeks endlessly. a river of tears for yeonjun and a great emotional outburst for soobin.

after crying in little sobs for couple of hours, he faced the mirror to watch his reflection that looked so foolish and messy to him as he stopped shaking and stared at his puffy red eyes. all he could see in his eyes was nothing but despair. damn, was he distraught already? running a hand through his hair in exasperation, he scrunched up his nose in disgust as more doubts started aborning.

does he even love me?
in all these years, nothing mattered to him.
is it my fault that he still can't trust me? what the fuck is he upto?

his eyes expanded as one of the many realisations hit him and all his heart prayed was to be proven wrong. every part of him wasn't ready to believe  it.

unlocking the bathroom, he searched for his phone which started ringing because of the alarm he had set earlier.

"time to take medicines, huh?" he mumbled to himself, opening his drawer and taking out a pill. he pretended to swallow it before going to bed, covering himself with a heavy blanket while waiting patiently for night.

as soon as darkness defeated the daylight, he got up of his bed and grabbed a jacket with enough cautions. all the lights of their home had yet to be turned on so he knew he wouldn't be caught in camera.

he had no idea why he was sneaking out like this when he could just simply go out but something in him was afraid of yeonjun. he felt like a prisoner breaking out from the lonely prison.

no sooner had he got to breath in open air than he knew where he had to go.

i hope whatever i'm thinking is wrong.

-

"you're here, so late."

yeonjun startled as all he expected was the soundtrack of every hue being washed into a strong vibrancy; the natural meoldy of rain. with big raindrops coming down just as hard, it was indeed raining crazily. what he didn't expect is a wide wakeful soobin.