"Breakfast!" Levi's voice echoed around my room, and I groaned as she flipped on my lights, blinding me.
"Five more minutes," I muttered, my voice rumbling in the morning. I had been up all night, sitting on the front lawn, making sure that no one came by the house because I couldn't sleep. I snuggled deep into my bed, but the blankets were ripped off of me, freezing air meeting my skin.
"Come on, Audrey, you can look at your tattoo now!" I groaned.
"Sleep," I muttered, like a zombie. Levi laughed.
"Still not a morning person huh?" She said. I opened my eyes and glared at her.
"Is that a serious question?" Levi laughed again. Her laugh is very pretty, it sounds like music notes. Everything about Levi is pretty. She doesn't have a care in the world, and she is a pretty girl, and she knows it. She flipped her long brown hair over her shoulder.
"I'm not a dude. I'm a queen." She said, sticking her nose in the air.
"Alright, alright, whatever helps you sleep at night," I muttered, earning a pillow smack to my face. I sat up, sputtering.
"Hah, I got you up, mom's making oatmeal, hurry up and put pants on." She stuck her tongue out at me. I flipped her off and smiled as she laughed and walked away from me. She seems so young, yet she is older than me.
I sighed, pulling Alex's sweatshirt tighter around my body.
It still smelled like him.
I missed him so much that it hurts. It's a literal, physical pain. My body is always full of tension, and I wake up, reaching for him. I hate myself for caring about him, but I can't help it. I kept making up scenarios in my head. I kept daydreaming about him, and about being in his arms again.
Numbness spread through my body, and I buried my face in my blankets. My childhood bed was a small twin mattress, but it comforted me.
I just wish I could have seen him one more time.
I don't get it, how can I fall this hard for someone in seven weeks? Especially him? He was so infuriating, so intoxicating, and he was someone who I hated the idea of.
I know I have to face my boss soon, and I am so fucking scared. I received a call two days after I got the tattoo, and it was from my boss. He said I was required to meet him at the base in a week.
I don't know what is going to happen to me, but I don't care anymore. I no longer have a reason to want to live. I will live for my family, but Alex doesn't care. He never has. All he wanted was a fuck. That's what I was telling myself to convince myself to go, but even I knew that I was lying. He had to care in some way.
God, why the hell is it so fucking hard to get over people?
He just saw me as a fuck buddy, and that's all I should have ever seen him as.
Stop fucking lying to yourself.
I groaned, laying back on my bed and letting my legs dangle over the edges. Suddenly, the doorbell rang, and Cama's barks echoed through the house. I was out of the bed faster than I could comprehend, and I grabbed the pre-loaded gun from the dresser drawer. I sprinted up the stairs and carefully pulled my mom away from the door, panting. I pressed a finger to my lips, my mind speeding.
What if it was my boss? What if it was a killer?
I took a deep breath, and slowly pulled my gun out from my sweatshirt. I hated the way mom flinched back from me when she saw the gun, but I had no damn choice. True, my arm still hurts from the tattoo, but that would not degrade my shot. I slowly opened the door, my eyes calculating the surroundings before taking in the person standing there.
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YOU ARE READING
Loving a Dangerous Life (editing)
RomansaDude I suck at writing these things, so if you have one for this book, hmu Trigger warnings: Talk about suicide, suicidal thoughts, talk about rape, trauma, murder, guns, and violence Complete