Battle of Bones (Anomaly Saga #5)

33

"So, Leta, what exactly are we dealing with here?" Jenna asked, perched atop the weight bench with a bag of Cheetos she had gotten from the lounge. The scarecrows had done a number on the HQ, turning it upside down to find what they wanted. Thankfully, Bramble's head was safely stored away in Chaps' home, and the broken vending machine only made it easier to get a bag of chips.

"Unfortunately, the issue is that we don't know, exactly," Leta said. "You've met Chaos - he's the head of it all. We know he's got people working with him, but we don't know who, exactly. Chaps thinks that scarecrow Thorn is working with Chaos, so we know he's got scarecrows on his side."

"There's also that guy - Vincent," Leo pointed out.

"He's the one who took you to Chaos?"

"Yup," Jenna said. "Just appeared inside our house and kidnapped us momentarily."

"Is Chaos just, like, an evil version of Chaps?" Daniel said.

"More or less, yes," Leta said. "So he pretty much has all the same abilities as Chaps and everything, although he isn't quite as funny and can be much more annoying. Now, as for Vincent . . ." She turned to a safe in the wall, input an oddly long code, and it opened to reveal a computer monitor. She entered a second password into the computer and clicked around a bit and then typed a little. "Do you know anything about this Vincent?"

"Only his name, really," Daniel said. "And that he's working for Chaos."

"Hm . . ." Leta scrolled the wheel on the mouse. "It doesn't appear that we have any related files. Of course, it could be any one of these Vincents - Vincent Warhol, who was committed to an institution in 1962 after he relentlessly insisted he had seen a talking skeleton teaching itself the Mashed Potato dance in an alleyway. Poor dude. Vincent McClanahan, who has been apprehended by interdimensional peacekeepers on multiple occasions for breaches of the Rules of Interdimensional Travel. Vincent Allen, who got stuck in the origami dimension . . . Interesting. Apparently, he slowly became two-dimensional during his time in the origami dimension. There was a pretty intensive study done on him once he had been recovered."

"Can't be any worse than the yarn dimension," Ariana said, stealing a Cheeto from her mother.

"So." Leta clapped her hands together as she turned back to face her trainees. "That said, it's best if we prepare for anything. Scarecrows, Vincents, or other, there's not a lot to tell what we'll be up against."

"Scarecrows are a piece of cake," Ariana said. "Dad and I have experience with them. He's the one who decapitated Bramble!"

Leo laughed nervously. "Let's not get ahead of ourselves, sweetheart. That was only one scarecrow. And it was after he nearly killed you. Twice."

Ariana folded her arms. "Please. I'm practically a scarecrow myself. If anybody here would know how to fight one, it's me."

"What've you got for us, Punky Brewster?" Leta said, leaning against the wall.

"Well, for one: there isn't exactly any human way to kill them," Ariana said. "We have a talking scarecrow head that goes to show. The only time in my ten years of living there that I saw any of them die was either when they were fed to the yarn sharks, or if they exploded out of unbridled happiness."

"I have to imagine they wouldn't survive being torched," Jenna said, swinging her blowtorch eagerly.

"Of course, we don't have to kill them," Leo said. "If we just chop all their heads off like we did with Bramble, then they can't fight anymore."

"I like your more ethical way of thinking, Orville," Leta said. "So let's make that your first lesson: how to properly chop off a scarecrow's head!"