Think Of Me ~ JJ Maybank ~ Outerbanks

28

"No, no, no- you think you're gonna fit through that hole?"
Kie glared at the boys.
"Hey, me and Kie can easily- and anyway I've lost weight recently."
"Yeah from copious amounts of coke intake."
"Pope let me live with the lies a little longer," the girl laughed in a put on exasperated voice.
"Maybe just Kie should go, Lex. You're  still really badly hurt, injuries like that don't just go away."
"Well I can't feel anything."
"Coke."
"Point made, Kie you're on your own."
She sat down against the side of the tomb, joined by JJ not too long after.
"You okay?"
She nodded, before shrugging. He raised his eyebrows at her.
Alex let her head drop, and shook it.
"What's up?"
"Coming down from my high, thinking, you know?"
The boy chuckled and lifted the cap from her head so he could see her eyes, "wanna talk about it?"
"Everything's changed so quickly, it's spooking me out. I feel wrong, like a completely different person."
"A lot has happe-"
"We've changed."
JJ sighed, and placed his head back against the wall.
"Is that so bad?"
She shrugged, "I don't know, it feels like I'm trying to walk through water, and the tides really strong."
The anxiety surging in her chest was getting too much to hide.
"I feel like, like I can't breathe."
The boy ran his eyes over her for a second, "you mean right now, don't you?"
Nodding, she blinked back tears, desperately trying to even put her breathing.
"It's like, it's like there's this massive ball in my chest just unraveling."
"Okay, okay- let's walk."
"But the others-"
"They aren't needing our assistance right now, just come with me."
They walked towards the Twinkie, Alex pulling JJ's cap further over her eyes.
He gently ran his hand down her side until their hands met, grasping hers gently.
He brought it up and placed her hand on her chest so she could feel her heartbeat.
"Feel that? Your heart is still beating. Okay? Focus on that, it's what I do when my anxiety is too much."
Climbing into the van, she nodded.
"How do you do it?"
JJ frowned and looked at her as he shut the door, "do what?"
"Act like it doesn't affect you? What your dad does. All I can think about is his face just as he was about to hit me."
"Yeah, I used to get that- still do."
She slumped back in the corner, shook her head, "so how'd you make it stop?"
They sat in silence for a few seconds as she eagerly awaited his answer.
"I haven't quite figured that one out yet."
"I'm calm now let's go back to the others."
The boy knew she was lying, but let it slide as they walked towards the graveyard.

Sorry for the late update I was busy reading waves definitely recommend lol