Hamesha and Forever - Sidnaaz

Chapter 18

He tugged her hand that was entwined with his. She looked up at his pale, worried face, his eyes asking her a thousand worried questions.
And then they changed, suddenly. His eyes flickered with a glint of anger and exasperation, and before she knew, he was pulling her to a side.
"Kya hai!" she scoffed, pulling away her hand.
"Shouldn't I be the one asking this? Shehnaaz......" he ran his fingers through his, clenching and unclenching his jaw. She knew this body language - He was trying to calm himself down.
She felt terrible. Terrible for causing them so much pain. For not being patient. For breaking her promises.......

He heard her sniffle, and that did what all his *hand moving through his hair* couldn't do, it made his anger vanish like it never existed.

He sighed, grabbing his bottle, opening the cap, forwarding it to her.
"betho!" he grumbled, pulling a stool with his legs.
She resisted the urge to smile as she sat down, sipping the water.
He took seat on a stool beside her.
She waited for him to speak, but nothing came. Only his sighs and grunts and muttering as he massaged his temples.
His feet, she noticed, were moving. And her breathe almost choked. It's been long since she'd seen him do that.
It's been long since you've seen him at all, paid attention to anything of his. Her mind scoffed at her. And at that moment, she DESPERATELY wished things could go back to how they were. If only......
Her heart, it pleaded her. Her heart, she followed.
"bhonk kuch!" she closed the cap of hi bottle, giving it back to him.
He looked her, like he was looking at a complex math problem.
"Kya hua?" She asked, her lips curving the slightest bit but her tone remained sharp.
"Aap...Mujh se baat kar rhi hein? Mujh se?" He asked her, his words laced with sarcasm and she held back the chuckle.
"Yes" she nodded pressing her lips.
"Ma'am, mein Sidharth Shukla hoon! Aap Mujh se kyon baat kar rhi hein!"
This time, she didn't hold in the chuckle.
She needed him right now, more than she needed his assurance. She needed his jokes, his anger, his sarcasm, his worry, his arms around her, just him and his presence.
"Sidhaaarthh!" she whined softly, almost like a whisper, her heart clamping. It has been so long.

He felt like she had extracted every little air from his lungs.
His name.....in her soft, sweet voice as she stretched it, like she was singing it. It's been so long!
and that piqued him even more.

He felt her fingers. He.....it was hard to believe......he felt her fingers wrap around his hand.
And he pulled his hand. Just the way she had.
He got up from the chair too, looking away.
Her eyes widened, moisture forming and he almost cursed aloud.
He felt so fucking torn!

"Sidharth-" she started but he cut her.
"Stop it Shehnaaz! Aisa nhi chalta yaar! Kabhi bhi aa jao, kabhi bhi door chaley jao! Jab tera Dil karey tu baat karey, jab tera Dil karey tu baat na karey!" He complained, almost too painfully and she felt something twist in her chest
She made a feeble attempt to justify "Mein hurt thi na..."
"Toh hurt sirf tu nhi hoti hai! Yahan pe....hum dono hai na involved? dono hai na? han? bolo? Toh ye Jo sab tu harkatein karti hai agley ko hurt nhi hota? Agley ko feel Nhi hota? chubta nhi hai tera ye behavior!" he spoke through gritted teeth.
"Haan toh agar tu mujhe hurt karey ga toh mein bhi karoon tujhe hurt! Phir agar tu hurt ho toh mujhe farak nhi parta!" She said, a little curtly.
"Meine kese hurt kiya? unintentionally? han? But tu jaan boojh ke kar rhi hai! Vo zyada bura lagta hai! aur achha hai bhyi! Tujhe koi farak nhi parta agar agla hurt ho, achha hai!" he chuckled sarcastically.
"Mera vo matlab Nhi tha Sidharth.....Farq parta hai.."
"Vo dikhta hai" he smirked, hiding the throb in his chest and the lump in his throat
"Vo achhi tarha dikhta hai. Bohot achey se!"
"Kya dikhta hai Sidharth! Kya hai yaar!" She said, putting her head in hands.
"Haan ye tamasha mat karo! Hum tumharey papa ke ghar pe nhi hein! Sab hein Yahan pe aur tu ye karey gi toh dekhein ge sab!" he clenched his jaw, trying to act normal in front of the prying eyes.
"Tu na ab baat mat Karna mere se!" She got up from the chair.
"Haan toh vo toh tu vese bhi nhi kar rhi hai mere saath!" he said nonchalantly and she wanted to bang her head on a wall
"Kay problem kya hai Teri!" she scoffed, irritated.
"Tu hai!" he spat right back.
and well, that bought her anger down and her lips curled, eyes rolling.
"Kutta hai tu!" she muttered, a playful hint to her voice and he didn't whether to laugh or to hit himself with a brick.
She was such a film!