chicken noodle soup || sope

ten

Um so this chapter has smut; kids and soft stans- it's time to leave ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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"HE CALLED HOBI A WHAT?" Namjoon screeched.

After work that day, Hoseok had gone over to Seokjin and Namjoon's apartment- correction, their penthouse- which was basically a second home to Hoseok. Namjoon had bought it for Seokjin and himself only a few months prior. It was stupidly expensive, but he could afford rent easily with his fat HYBE Entertainment paycheques. The penthouse had huge windows, way too many bedrooms and even hot water! Hoseok had quickly determined that it sure as hell beat spending time alone in his grimy shoebox of an apartment.

The chefs had been recounting the days events over a squash risotto (Seokjin's choice and creation), although Seokjin was beginning to consider that telling Namjoon might not been the best idea.

"I'm going to kill him. I am going to murder that man," Namjoon said with a frighteningly emotionless face. "I will string him up by his pea-sized balls, and then pluck out his eyelashes one by one and feed them to him. Then I'll throw him in one of his ovens and bake him into a pie, so when I leave the man pie out on the roof, he'll be slowly pecked at by crows until he no longer exists. Then I'll go find his father and kick that old man in the balls because that man clearly had evil sperm and he shouldn't be allowed to have any more children."

Seokjin rolled his eyes, "Would you please calm your abnormally large tiddies? Hobi said he apologized."

"That doesn't make it okay..." Namjoon huffed, eyeing the red-haired boy and wondering how anyone could ever hurt him.

"No, it doesn't mean it's okay," Seokjin agreed, "But it might mean that he doesn't deserve to get baked into a pie."

"Whatever..." Namjoon grumbled, deciding that he would hate this Min Yoongi guy forever.

"It's okay Joonie, really!" Hoseok said with his usual amount of pep. "He's even going to give me extra training so I can work on my chef skills."

"I don't like the idea of you hanging out with him more than you need to," The taller man grimaced, turning to his boyfriend. "What if the asshole says something else to hurt our son?"

"Then I give you permission to bake him into a pie," Seokjin giggled, shooting his boyfriend a wink. He didn't like his boss very much either after the scene in the kitchen, but Hoseok seemed to have forgiven him for whatever reason, so Seokjin decided to give him another chance as well, just making note to watch out for his younger friend a little more carefully from now on.

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Later that night, after dropping Hoseok off at his apartment, Seokjin was playing with Namjoon's hair as they watched 'Barbie in the 12 Dancing Princesses' together. It was the sixth movie in their endeavour to watch all of the Barbie movies- Seokjin's idea, clearly. Although Namjoon had originally objected, the movies slowly grew on him to the point where he found himself "ah"ing along to the opening theme song. It kinda slaps, the big-time music producer thought to himself.

"I'm going to record this in case I ever need to blackmail you," Seokjin joked as his boyfriend hummed along to the dancing princesses on the screen. "Your co-workers would never let this go."

"You record me, and you die," Namjoon laughed as Seokjin's fingers raked through his hair, "I don't even know how you got me to agree to these movies."

"I distinctly remember it involving a few blowjobs," Seokjin giggled.

"Oh yeah," Namjoon grinned, fondly remembering the older man's plump lips wrapped around his cock. "That was nice..."