Kiss My Eyes And Lay Me To Sleep

Chapter 36

Don't look down, don't look back, I am beside you

Close your eyes, know I'm, here.

I know it's hard, to let go all that defines you

You feel like you'll never be whole again

We will find a way to erase the past

Stay with me, stay here with me!

In my arms you'll be fine I never let go

All you've lost will come again

Just stay here with me

Never look back, never again, it's over

Everything ends here in my arms

Don't give in, don't let your, memories break you

Let me take you away from here

We will find a way to make this last

Stay with me, stay here with me!

In my arms you'll be fine I never let go

All you've lost will come again

Just stay here with me

Never look back, never again, it's over

Everything ends here in my arms

I'll be here forever! (Everything ends)

Here in my arms!

I'll be here forever! (Everything ends in my arms!)

I'll be here forever! (Forever, forever)

In my arms you'll be fine I never let go

All you've lost will come again

Just stay here with me

Never look back, never again, it's over

Everything ends here in my arms

"How bout we watch a movie?" Nath asked. Sena looked to him and started wracking her brain for films to watch. She then chose one from my stash under the bed. I smiled when she held it up for approval. West Side Story- a classic! Nath nodded in approval and put in the DVD while Sena crawled up in the bed. Once the film was in, he climbed in the bed with us, snuggling close to me, squishing Sena in the middle of us. She didn't seem to mind though.

About halfway through the movie, Sena fell asleep, using my arm as a blanket and curled up against Nath's chest. I smiled at the sleeping child, then noticed the time. It was after one in the morning.

"Merry Christmas, babe." I whispered to Nath. He smiled and kissed my hand.

"Merry Christmas to you too, love. I love you so much." He replied.

I then removed myself from Nath and grabbed a small package from my drawer.

"It's not much, but—I couldn't not get you something." I told him as I handed it to him.

He quietly opened the wrapped package and soon his bright green/blue eyes bored into the picture that was in his card.

"That's from my first scan. See there's the feet, and the head, and the tiny hands." I said quietly, pointing out our child's features. I swear I could see happy tears rimming his eyes.

"I have an appointment in two weeks. The doc says the baby should be developed enough to find out what gender it is."

Nathan smiled and tucked the picture away in his shirt. "We'll find out, won't we?" He said cheekily grinning at me.

He then climbed out of bed and grabbed something from his bag. He pulled out three items; a small booklet, a box, and a large stuffed animal.

He handed me the booklet. "Open it."

I did as he asked, and gasped. His own handwriting, and pictures of us together covered each page. There were small love notes, reasons he loved me; it was clear he spilled his heart out in this book.

"Nath! Is-is this really how you feel about me?" I asked, tearing up. Sena stirred between us, but didn't wake.

"I can't really tell you how I feel China, cuz when I'm around you, all I can think is, 'I love this girl. How'd I get so damn lucky?' and I know I'll be gone a lot. So I want you to read a page or two of this everyday I'm gone. It'll comfort you when you're sad till I come back."

I was nearly crying at his speech. He really cared about me that much? He then opened the tiny jewelry box he had. I gasped at it. It was the "yin" (black) portion of the yin yang symbol. The circle in the center was a diamond- Nath's birthstone.

"Nath, oh my God, that's too sweet. I-I can't." I stuttered, covering my mouth. He smiled at me and yanked something out from beneath his shirt. It was the "yang" (white) portion of the symbol. Where the black circle in the center should be, there was my birthstone-garnet.

"I got these while we were in Brazil. Been wearing yours since I bought them. Now you're right here, close to my heart, no matter how far away I might be from you."

I stared at him, as I took the necklace that held his birthstone in it. "Nath, you're always in my heart. I all but cursed my mom to hell when she started talking shit about you and our baby. I love you, and nothing's changed that." I told him.

"Come on let me spoil my girl every now and then. You deserve it, babe. I love you more than anything." He said, smiling at me.

I blushed and looked down at my sleeping cousin.

"You're gonna be a great mum to our little girl." He said, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

"You're so sure it's gonna be a little girl, aren't you?" I asked. He chuckled and nodded.

"I am."

I chuckled and looked at the stuffed monkey he was using as a pillow.

"You got a thing for monkeys now?" I asked cheekily. He laughed and pulled the monkey out from behind him.

"I actually got for Sena. You said she liked monkeys right?"

If possible, the smile on my face grew wider. Nathan genuinely cared about Sena.

"Yeah she does. Her favorite animal."

"I wanted to get her something. She's like your little sister and honestly one of the cutest kids I've ever met." He said, adjusting himself so that he had an arm wrapped around Sena.

"I'm sure she'll love it." I said as I tried to settle down into bed. Our child was wide-awake, and certainly letting me know.

"You okay babe?" Nath asked. I nodded and placed a hand on my almost six month pregnant stomach.

"Yeah, I'm alright. Seems lil one here feels like he should be doing his exercises right now." I said, feeling the baby kick against my belly. It felt like tiny butterflies were fluttering around. I felt slightly uncomfortable though, so I knew he'd grown quite a bit.

Nathan gently placed his warm hand on my stomach and started to slowly stroke it. It felt so nice. I leaned my head back on the pillow and relaxed as the baby's kicking slowly died down.

"You're gonna be an amazing daddy." I told him as I shut my lids, feeling oh so tired. He moved his hand from my belly and grasped my hand, placing warm kisses on it.

Everything felt wonderful. Though in the next room, I knew some of my friends were stoned, drunk, or fucking, I had my family here with me in my bed. I stole a glance at Nath and realized he had closed his eyes, still holding my hand. Sena stirred and cuddled close to Nath, burying her face in his chest.

"My big brother." She mumbled quietly.

I smiled and closed my eyes, feeling sleep take me under.