Ineffable Euphoria

Kabanata 1

Kabanata 1...
Men

I put my hair in a high sleek ponytail as I stare at myself on the mirror. The wind blew my curtain and the sunlight strike my mirror, sending natural light to my figure. I pursed my lips and feel my hips above my clothes.

Beauty was never my lack. I always had a good body, makes sense that I was then engaged with joining beauty pageants and even partake in modeling. I tell no one but deep inside, a little voice in me whispered, "I hate it." Perhaps I missed walking in a stage as the crowd roar my name like there's no tomorrow, or when I wear luxurious clothes just to stride in a ramp, but remembering how countless thirsty men sexualized my body, it makes me want to throw up.

It's disgusting.

My body shivered when I remembered how it felt like. It's as if I was a mere barbie doll wrapped up in a plastic box. They can't touch me, but the thirsty stares still sting. That's one of the reasons why I quit.

No woman deserves to be objectified, and I'm not gonna give those men what they don't deserve.

Yet here I am, getting ready for a man with a girlfriend that's too snub to even have a decent conversation with me.

"Have you seen Aga, ate?" I asked our house help.

"Si Aga ba? Nariyan yata at nakita ko ang sasakyan kanina,"

Tumango ako bago bitbit ang cellphone ay tinungo ang labas ng bahay.

Hindi naman kami nawawalan ng bisita kaya hindi na ako nagulat nang madatnan ang mga tao. Ipinalibot ko ang tingin para mahanap si Aga, pero hindi ko s'ya namataan. Nagtungo ako sa parking lot pero wala rin doon ang sasakyan n'ya.

Umirap ako.

Whatever. If he doesn't want me to pay for my damages, e 'di 'wag.

Ako:

Daddy, are you at the municipal hall?

I didn't anticipate that much for a reply since I know he's busy. Nagkibit balikat ako ng ilang minuto ang lumipas ay wala nga akong natanggap. Tinawagan ko na lang ang numero ng kan'yang assistant para itanong kung nasaan si Daddy at tinawag na ang driver para magtungo doon.

Today, I decided to help distribute the relief goods. Tamang-tama rin na naroon si Daddy at makausap ko na s'ya sa gagawin naming outing.

Hindi pa man ako nakakalabas ng sasakyan ay marami na ang napalingon. Binitbit ko ang sling bag at sandaling inayos ang sumbrelo bago lumabas ng sasakyan.

"Hi Tito! Do you know where Dad is po?" I asked one of Daddy's pals who I immediately saw after walking inside the venue.

"Mayor's overseeing the people, hija. He's just around that corner where the residents are,"

I flashed a smile and say my gratitude before walking down the path he guided me. Habang mas lumalapit ako ay mas naririnig ko ang ingay ng mga tao. Sandali ko pang nilingon ang tila gumuhong gusali sa gilid bago nilapitan ang nakaunipormeng tauhan ni Daddy.

"Can I talk to the mayor?"

Before he could even answer, we heard a familiar man called the nickname I despise. "Marj!"

I roll my eyes before boring my eyes at him.

"I hate your face,"

He chuckled at my words. "Chill, Marj. Let a minute go before getting feisty at me,"

Mr. President in his annoying smirk and teasing stare is standing before me wearing a minimal designed shirt and above the knee shorts. I should've thought of seeing him here, e 'di sana ipina-clear ko muna ang buong lugar.