I'll Always Look Out For You

52 | Stargazer | November 1, 1899

And here we are. This is supposed to be a short and sweet chapter, but knowing me...we'll just have to see what happens haha. Enjoy! :)

"Sta-Stargazer?"

No response.

"Stargazer?"

Spot crawls over to his cousin and sinks down lower. "Theodore?"

That seems to strike something in Stargazer. He lifts his head up a little, but lowers it again. He's still muttering to himself. If they would listen closer, they would hear him repeating the phrase "That little house we'll move in to when we're 21." His back is hunched, his knees brought up to his chin, his arms wrapped around himself. 

Race knows that sitting position all too well.

Stargazer is lost inside his own mind.

But what prompted this deep void of getting lost inside of one's own mind?

Even Race never went this far.

But he's still had plenty of experience going there.

He's torn. What should he do? Should he give Spot and Stargazer some space? Or should he try and help? He doesn't know what to do, so he stands there silently, feeling absolutely helpless.

"Could you maybe get Ray to come here please?" Race whispers to Jim Barlow. "Tell him it's important."

The older man nods and walks out down the hall that they came in through.

Race turns back to Spot and Stargazer.

Spot has his hands on his cousin. "Theo? It's me. Sean. I'm your cousin. Remember me?"

Spot never imagined meeting up with his cousin in this way. He came up with many scenarios of what might happen, yes, but not a single one he imagined ended up like this.

Stargazer still is unresponsive. Just continuing his soft muttering (of his one phrase over and over again) and avoiding eye contact.

Spot just wants to know what's going through his cousin's mind.

Stargazer isn't just lost in his mind.

He's trapped inside it.

He's too deep in, too far away from the surface to be able to call out.

Race can see that. He knows that he has to do something.

He sits down next to Spot.

"Why is he like this?" Spot turns to Race, looking like he's about to start crying. "What did they do to him?"

Race doesn't answer. He looks right at Stargazer. "Mister Stargazer? I'm Racetrack. I know your cousin. And I know what it's like to be trapped inside your mind like this."

"Know what it's like."

Both Race and Spot sit up. A response. Weak and whispery, but still a response.

Then Spot has an idea. "You would take me on the rooftops, remember? We would see the stars together."

"See the stars."

Spot smiles. "Yep. That's my cousin in there."

"Glad it's working." Race has seen this before. He's been this before. True, he's never had mental shut downs as severe as this. But he knows the feeling of repeating words when he has none of his own to say. If they give him enough words, that might bring him back.