Consume my broken heart

Chapter 23

I have never asked Barbie for help. When she ignored me after the attack, I was angry and disappointed. We've never had a great sister bond as you see them in the movies, but we were okay. Barbie had her friends, and I had mine. In school, she usually ignored me, and from this day on, I can't even figure out why she had acted the way she always did.

Unfortunately, tomorrow is the big day. Matthew Young was the second on the list. Tomorrow he will attend a party with a friend of his. Guy Slater was very rich and handsome, yet he was never part of their schemes. Guy arrived just past the attack. He had seen all the fuss at school, but I think he wanted to show off a little, as he was the new kid in school. So he never knew what truly happened. Maybe they told him, maybe they didn't. Who knows what they have been saying about me to other guys.

Everyone, at school, will be there. I know my name is on the list as well, just as Barbie's. Still, I'm not sure why, because she's two years older than me. I'm hoping she hasn't slept with him as well. Although she's invited, there must be a reason behind it. I never knew they have known each other back in the days. I feel my fingers cramp because of the fist I was holding against her bedroom door. This needed all my courage to just consider her helping me for the party tomorrow.

I can only say I admire her sexual presence and the way she just turns every man around her manicured fingers. It's a talent, which I don't have, but what I need for tomorrow. I'm not even sure I'll set through with my stupid plan of seducing him in front of his soon-to-be wife. My reputation is already damaged, so it's not why I'm worried about it. What I worry about is if I have the skills to get him that far.

I'm not sleeping with him for sure. I just need him to come close enough, maybe kiss him worst-case scenario. His wife Brady deserves a better man. He has been cheating on her since the beginning of their relationship. For two years she's been holding up with his crap and his lies. I can't even understand why she still believes him. He has to be a master at lying as well.

Suddenly, the door bursts open to reveal my sister in a very short pink dress. Her hair was neatly done in a fixed bun. You couldn't even see one hair out of place. She seeks perfection, and she hopes to find that perfection in a man. Will Rick be that guy? Let's hope so or else she will hunt tomorrow and I can't jeopardize her for stealing Matthew because he'll be mine. He must be...

"Were you daydreaming in front of my bedroom?" Barbie asks with a smug face.

"No, I wasn't." I snap. "I need your help with something," I add before I regretted this.

"What?" she asks agitated.

"I need your fashion skills today," I say. "I'm desperate for help." I continue as I see her mouth fall open in shock.

"Is this a joke?" She asks while folding her arms in front of her chest. Of course, she doesn't even trust her own sister. Like I make jokes all the time.

"No," I sigh and roll with my eyes. "It's for that party tomorrow," I inform her.

"You are going to Matthew's party?" She asks, dumbfounded.

"Yes," I answer shortly and look at my feet for a moment. She'll be questioning me about why I would go to a guy who was my potential rapist. I never knew the entire truth about that night, but maybe I can find out, eventually.

"Why?" She asks rapidly in a serious tone. She's way too curious, however, how can I deny her some information. Maybe I'll need her guidance at the party as well.

"I'm going to seduce him in front of his fiance." I blurted boldly, hoping I won't regret it for telling her.

Barbie eyes me curiously and I shift on my other foot, not knowing if she could ever understand why I need to do this.

"You want revenge." She whispers so nobody could hear us, as my parents were downstairs watching television.

I nod shortly and swallow all my pride. Back in the days, I would never think of doing such a thing, but now it's the only thing I can think of. They need some kind of punishment. If karma doesn't want to do their job, I will.

"Matthew would never rape someone." She answers softly. I scrunch my eyebrows and eye her suspiciously.

"Really? And how would you know?" I ask her in offense. Is she that naïve? She wasn't there that night.

"Because he told me. He has never fancied you. He wanted me." She says ashamed like she's telling the absolute truth, which I think she just did. My mouth falls open for a moment.

"Barbie, did you sleep with him?" I ask her face to face. I need to know if that sick bastard also had got his hands on my sister as well.

"No," she answers, her smile faltering almost immediately. "I couldn't." She says hesitantly, with her eyes downcast.

"Why?" I ask her rapidly, feeling myself becoming on edge. The thought of them together made me sick. She knew what I've been through.

"I don't know...he wanted to, but the thought of you and what they did to you. I just couldn't. It began three years after what had happened to you." She answers and I feel tears prickling behind my eyelids. I don't even know what to say. She didn't do it. God, she didn't do it with him.

"Thank you," I answer relieved, and I don't even know why I'm thanking her. It's that split second I see her in a different light. I know she isn't the perfect sister. We are too different, but she believed me. I always assumed she didn't and thought I was exaggerating things. Barbie never asked about it, never talked about it. I always had the feeling she was ashamed of me because of her ignorance.

I know we are not perfect, yet this was an eye-opener for me just as it was for her because the next thing she wrapped her arms around me. I could feel her silent sobs close to my ear.

"I'm so sorry I was never there for you. I was too busy dealing with my own problems. You were always perfect, Grace. Boys noticed you because you are beautiful and smart. I'm just beautiful. I can't offer the things you have. Guess, I was always jealous of you and after you got raped, I felt guilty for comparing me to you. It wasn't fair to you. It was childish and I'm disgusted with myself for blaming you to get more attention from mom and dad. What you've been through was horrible and I didn't know how to behave myself around you. It was hard for me too, you know. If I had been looking out for you, I could have warned you about them." Barbie rambles, a few pieces were more clear than others.

I withdraw from my sister's tight grip and face her with tears falling from my eyes, but I felt happy and relieved. A smile spreads across my face when I see my sister's face becoming a mess. Still, she's my sister. I love her and I will never stop loving her how crazy our relationship gets.

"I love you Barbie," I say with a trembling voice, knowing this was the first time I told her those words, but they were needed. She needs to know she has my support, and I don't blame her for anything. She's my sister, after all.

"I love you too." She whispers with a small smile. "Come on, let's go shopping." She giggles with teary eyes. "My little sister." She adds with adoration.