Steel My Soul ✓

03 | Skin

I N D I G O

'I like getting under your skin.' The next note read. It was written in orange ink.

As if I wasn't under enough stress from upcoming assessments, some idiot thought it would be entertaining to play Pretty Little Liars with me. Dumbass, I thought as I scrunched the paper and threw it in the metal bin at the end of the hallway.

I must've looked up from the ground too fast because my head began to spin. Closing my eyes, I breathed deeply. When I opened my eyes, I wished I would've remained enveloped in darkness instead of connecting my eyes with Kennedy.

"Lovely to see you," She brushed her auburn hair away from her face. "Careful not to spill water down anyone else's neck anytime soon."

"I will reserve that next moment for you, Ken," I plastered a fake smile on my lips before walking past her haunting gaze.

I knew she hated when I called her Ken. I'd always call her that when we were friends. Then she got some attention from boys and decided they were more important than me. Only, we didn't drift apart as I wished would've happened instead of the stunt she pulled.

Unluckily, after she embarrassed me so terribly that I ran home crying, Chancey was there to take the rest of the brunt of the embarrassment with me. He was there for me after that. Then everything else happened, and now I couldn't stand the sight of either of them.

I would've given him a chance after my father's funeral, but not even two weeks later, his lips were on hers, and all I saw was red. Of course, I wanted to believe that she kissed him first, but there was a burning rage that took over the moment he opened his mouth to redeem himself.

Redeem himself over what? Apparently, he'd done nothing wrong.

But then the words he mumbled to his football team a year later became etched into my brain, staining every good memory I had of Chancey De Loughrey.

"Hey, Indi, hold up!" The voice of Adara Farah drifted through the hallway.

I turned to face her olive complexion as she walked over to me. A beige hijab framed her round face, which appeared rounder as she smiled at me.

"Hi," I replied hesitantly.

After Kennedy, then Chancey, I didn't end up having many friends. I didn't even find it in myself to trust anyone.

"Do you have a free period next?" She asked, tilting her head to the side as she waited for an answer.

"Um, yeah, I do," I nodded, blinking a few times to snap out of the sudden blurriness that invaded my eyesight.

"Cool," Her smile brightened. "Listen, Serenity, Dawn and I are going to grab a bite from Cafe Paci. We were wondering if you wanted to join us."

I paused at her words.

"Well, I don't want to intrude," I insisted.

Hanging out with a trio would leave me fourth wheeling, and if I was going to feel left out, I might as well have eaten lunch on my own.

"Okay, I know what you're thinking," She pushed her hands out in front of her, gesturing for me to pause. "You might feel wrong sitting with a group of three friends, but trust me, you won't feel left out. We just always see you alone, and I don't know if that's your thing, but if it's not, you have us as an option too, yeah?"

Her reassuring words and welcoming brown eyes almost won me over.

"Violet!"

But Chancey's voice calling out to me from the lockers was a bigger push.

"Okay, fine," I held onto Adara's arm and turned her around in the opposite direction.

I didn't miss the small chuckle she tried to hide.

"That was because of Chancey, wasn't it?"

Her question made me feel like a bitch.

"It's okay if you don't want to hang around us, Indigo. I won't judge you on that because I have no idea why. I was only offering-"

"No, I'm sorry," I shook my head, rotating my head to face her as we walked past the students. "That was a dick move. I only agreed to get away from him."

"Don't worry. I get it. Chancey hangs out with my idiot cousin and their idiot football team," She sighed as we reached the end of the hallway. "But, really, if you want to hang out with us, please do."

I nodded, plastering a smile on my lips that was the closest to real it had gotten in a while. 

letter 03 - skin

I love getting under your skin. 

It was the closest I could get to you. 

If I couldn't touch your skin, I would work my way from under it.

I love holding you. Keeping you in my arms feels like Heaven. 

Please never forget how it feels to be wrapped in my embrace because I know I never will.