Future Mrs. Robertson

Thirteen

John

I know a lot of people may deem me as a very selfish and heartless person but I'm anything like that. My marriage with Sindi crumbled down years ago. Even before Alex was born. I kept going back to her because I was holding on the love which happened to be one sided. I believed that me loving her was a way to show her how to love me but it never came. She chose to continue cheating even when  I caught her with my sister. It's a pity that it's only now that I learned that love wasn't supposed to hurt, at least not this much.

In all honesty I never wanted Alex. I only accepted her thinking that maybe, just maybe Sindi would see just how much I love her. I thought accepting Alex, Sindi would see I'd go to any lengths for her but that never happened. I remained not enough for Sindi and that only cause uncontrollable anger. I ended up hating Alex and doing things to her I would never do to my blood.
I'm not saying or justifying my actions but at some point Sindi pushed me over the edge.

I did things I'm not proud of because of love. Love turned me into this monster. Love turned me into a drunkard. I can only stay sober for a minute and not anytime longer. I'm afraid under the influence I turn into something I myself can not stand. The person at the receiving end of the stick would always be Alex since she was always around. Whenever there was an outing that involved Kate and Emma, Alex would stay behind given an excuse. It's either she was grounded for something stupid or she had to stay with Sindi to spend some quality time.

But the truth is Kate's truth was threatened by the bond Emma had with Alex. If anything their bond was one not to be taken lightly. There was a time when attending thanksgiving Emma suddenly felt sick not a minute late Alex came down with a very high fever and was restless. Emma took Alex in her arms and both of them were okay. It's like they were never sick but just missing each other.

After leaving the hotel yesterday I drove all the way home noticing Kate's car outside I just went straight to bed.
I'm currently heading down stairs. A guy's got to eat.
As I got to the kitchen I'm met with Alex eating and Kate feeding Angel while also eating.

Me : Isn't this lovely, Just the people I wanted to see.

Kate : Oh Hi John, I didn't know you here. Sindi said you guys had some business trip.

Side eyeing Alex I can see her uncomfortably shifting in her sit.

Me : Yeah well we had a fight. A messy one at that but that's not the point. I was thinking, How about we tell Alex the truth. I mean it's only fair.

It was as if something in Kate shifted. She quickly stood up and made her way towards me. Alex's head turned to my side and looked at me curiously.

Kate : John please no. Whatever you and my sister are going through can be fixed. Please don't do this.

Me : Why Kate? Why shouldn't I? Because you hate her?

Kate : John stop! You know that's not true. I love Alex!

Me : But not enough to keep her? I wonder why's that. I mean you are her mother after all.

The went silent. Only Angel's blabbering could be heard.

Sindi

After John left yesterday I kept calling my sister but her phone was never answered. I couldn't sleep. I ended up calling an uber since John and I used one car to come here. But traffic was just being a bitch. I only got home around 10 am. I quickly made my way inside the house noticing Kate's car outside.

Immediately after opening the door the tension engulfed me. You could cut through it with a knife.

I was met with Kate. Her face held fear. She had tears streaming down her face. She had Angel in her arms.
Alex stood there frozen. Her lips slightly apart. And John stood there with an evil smirk holding a bottle of beer.

John : Ahhhh talk about perfect timing. Babe I was just telling Alex that Kate's her mother. But I'm pretty sure you'd tell the story better than me.
Alex turned to face me.

Her : Mom tell me he is lying.
Before I could answer John took the platform.

Him : Oh come on Alex you don't honestly believe you our child. I mean my children are normal not freaks or abominations.

Kate : Don't you fucking dare call her those things.!

John : And she cares ladies and gentlemen I'm out.
He grabbed his keys and left.

Me : Alex baby, I can explain...

Alex : I don't need any explanation from you. I want the truth!

Me : Yes it's true.
It came out as a whisper.

Alex gathered herself wiping her tears. I've seen a lot of things in those eyes but not anger and definitely not hatred.
She pushed through me and headed for the door.

Kate : Alex! Wait!

Alex ran and disappeared down the street.

Kate : Why did he do this?
She was a sobbing mess.

Me : He found out about me cheating and leashed out.

Kate : Wow classic Sindi move. Couldn't you have kept your pants on? You messed everything up!

Me : Excuse you? If anyone's to blame is you. You treated Alex like shit from the moment you gave birth to her. Oh no Kate! You don't get to blame me for this one. This is all on you! Ungrateful bitch. I don't have time for this I need to go find Your daughter!

Kate : I'm coming with.

Me : Oh no you don't. You going to go home and explain this shit to Emma and pray that John isn't there already.

I got to the driver's sit and drove off not minding my speed. If anything I'm not coming back without Alex.

Kate

The drive home wasn't that long. Angel was just peacefully sleeping at the back.
Luckily I didn't spot John's car in the drive way as I made my way in.
Getting in the house I was greeted with laughter.
Faith saw me first.

Faith : Mommy's back!
She came running towards me...Others continued playing the X- box.

Me : Baby where's your daddy?

"I'm here"
Em says coming from the kitchen. She came and took Angel from me.

Me : We need to talk.
She went and put Angel in her room then came to meet me in ours.

Her : What's wrong babe. Why you crying?

Me : I need to tell you something. Remember when I had to attend that lectures trip?
She nodded.

Her : When I left I didn't attend the trip. In fact I asked the Dean for a leave. I had found out I was two months pregnant at the time.

Em : What!?

Me : Please don't shout. The kids are down stairs.

Her : Wtf! Who was the father and where's the baby!?
I flinched as she screamed.

Me : You got me pregnant Em. At the time you were a student. I wasn't even sure you wanted kids. You need to understand I had to do what was right at the time.

Her : Kate I'm not asking again. Where. Is. The. Baby!

Me : I gave her to Sindi. Alex is our baby.

I said it in a whisper.