Not Enough (complete)

10. I like someone

Yang Zi had grown from that shy girl into a confident young woman and it showed. She was happy to run into her old friends. Even if they hadn't kept in touch all this time, news about them still reached her somehow. She knew they both schooled abroad but Xiao Zhan hardly came back.

She schooled in a university in the country and filled them up on most of their old classmates. The three chatted like old friends, there was no bit of tension between them. It was obvious that what happened during their teenage years didn't make their conversation awkward.

Xiao Zhan couldn't figure out why everyone asked him the same question, Yang Zi was no exception.

"Are you still single? Is there someone in your life now?"

Xiao Zhan took a sip of his drink. Perhaps, it was due to the fact that they had gotten along pretty well so far or the number of drinks he had taken, he spoke as sincerely as possible.

"You asked two different questions, I'd answer them separately. Yes, I'm single, I'm not dating. As for if I have someone in my life, well, it's a bit complicated. I like someone, I've liked that person for a long time but my feelings are one sided. I don't know if that counts as having someone in my life".

For more than 5 years, Xiao Zhan and Yibo haven't talked about anything concerning their feelings for each other. When Yibo heard Xiao Zhan's reply, he involuntarily took a large gulp off his drink, Xiao Zhan could see his Adams apple rolling as he tried to swallow. Yang Zi on the other hand failed to notice the tension between them.

"Ha, so... that's why I was rejected so brutally in the past. You were one person who understood me very well and you knew exactly what I wanted even though I could not bring myself to say it out loud. You couldn't even save me some face, I was rejected at every turn. Back then, I resented you a little but now I understand. I suffered from my feelings not being reciprocated, who knew I wasn't suffering alone. I feel a lot better now".

"About all that, I'm sorry..."

"Ha? Why are you apologizing, it's okay. That was long ago. I got into a relationship that didn't last a month, who knows, maybe we would have turned out the exact same way".

As she spoke, she turned to look at Yibo and noticed he was feeling a little uncomfortable. She felt her words had put him in a tight spot so she tried to steer the conversation back towards Xiao Zhan.

"As for that person who failed to return your feelings, who is she? If she's someone I know, maybe I can put in a good word for you".

She kept waiting for an answer but got none, she turned to look at Xiao Zhan and noticed his eyes were on the young man sitting opposite him. As a matter of fact, his eyes had been on him all along, she just didn't notice in time. She turned to look at Yibo and from the way his hands trembled slightly as he held on to the glass, she had already put things together.

"It's not a she, it's a he".

Yeah, she kind of already figured, there was no need to ask any further questions. The three sat silently for some time. Xiao Zhan felt these 5 years were enough to forget his feelings for Yibo but it turned out they were only suppressed and the moment he laid his eyes on him, they all came pouring back. He knew Yibo didn't feel the same way, there was no need pursuing the matter but... it hurt, it hurt a lot. He didn't intend to pursue him, friends was all they could be but the feeling in his heart, it wasn't so easy to get rid of.

Xiao Zhan blamed his inability to control his feelings at the moment on the drinks. He wanted a little privacy. When he was away, he had all the privacy he needed but right now, he needed a bit of time. He excused himself to go use the bathroom. It had been years since he last went to the bathroom to vent, to be alone. It seemed nothing had changed after all.