Pay the price

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I woke up early in the morning with the sound of Cara making breakfast, I checked the clock to see it was 7:00 am. Cara said she would stay here a few days so she could be here for me. I got up my floral bed and went to the kitchen with the smell of eggs. "Hey you're finally awake!" I went up to her and hugged her I'm a lucky person to have her as my friend." Smells good ill get the table set up." I set the table up with orange juice and ketchup. "Cara what are you wearing?" I started laughing as I saw her with a shirt that said 'Mommas Home' and oversized rainbow sweatpants. "My pjs" soon we both started cracking up. "Alright let's eat I hope their good I don't really cook." We started eating the eggs which were actually good when we heard a knock on the door. "I'll get it" I told her as I came to the door and opened it. "Oh hi Bells", it was Niall. "Hi"

"We need to talk"

"Right now?"

"Yeah I have a photoshoot in an hour"

"Okay come in."

I led him into my apartment, I was nervous." Niall what did I tell you," Cara eyed Niall with anger. "I need to talk to her, work things out." She left for the guest bedroom and we stood alone, silence filling the room. "Um so you wanted to talk?" I said trying to break the silence." "Oh yeah um, well I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for all of this I was stupid and I wasn't thinking. And if you are pregnant ill help you if you keep it." Wow, he was pretty concerned, but it was no question that I was going to keep the baby no matter what. "Niall If I am pregnant I'm going to keep the baby, but I'm not sure if I want you in the baby's life." I could see hurt in his eyes, maybe I shouldn't have said that. "Why?" He said almost in a whisper. "Because your not even going to be here, your gonna be touring, doing interviews, and other things you do, oh and you live in another country!"There was another awkward silence as he sat down on the couch, slowly putting his hands on his head. "Bells, I can try. We can work this out but we need to find out if you really are first."

"Okay." He got up, said goodbye and left. How can this happen to me, one of the worlds biggest band member could be a father because of me. I would have been fine with this if I was in love with him and if I didn't do it drunk.

************

1 and a half weeks later-

" I can't do this." I held a box of the pregnancy test in my hand. "I know this is hard for you but you have to know, and the sooner the better." She was right as always, so I sucked it up and tried my first test. After about half and hour of drinking beverages and peeing I took all of the tests. "Bells come on look at them just turn them around. I hesitated turning the 14 sticks around. Oh my god! "So what happened? Are you or are you not?" I pushed her to the sticks and she was speechless. All of the sticks read positive or a happy face which was not even close to my face. "NO! CARA IM DEAD!" I couldn't stand this, I started bawling my eyes out and fell on the floor, confused. "Shush, it's alright, I'll take you to a doctors appointment."

"I just ruined his life, it's not alright, it's never going to be alright!Ever!"

She stood me up,"Don't you ever say that.You didn't ruin his life. I'll call him if you want." I can't tell him this, he's way to busy to worry about this so I'm gonna do what's best for us. "No ill call him, I think it's better for me to tell him." "Go ahead, I'll go make an appointment." She gave me his number , I don't know why she still has it.

*Ring*

"Hello?"

"Hi this is Bells"

"Oh hey Bells"

"I have something to tell you"

"Yes?"

"I um....... I'm not pregnant I took a few tests"

"Really? Oh wow that's good"

"Yeah I know, um well yeah that's it"

"Okay well I'm sorry for the stress I caused you"

"It's fine. I have to go bye"

"Bye Bells"

I did the right thing right?

"Did you call him?" Cara asked as she walked into the bathroom. "Yeah."

"Well what did he say?" Great. "I told him that he didn't need to be a part of the baby's life, and he took it rough but said okay." For the first time my lied actually worked on her. Yes, I am very proud of my self, but I shouldn't be. I just needed to sleep, so I went to the bed, and tried to sleep. Key word 'tried'. Everything was just processing in my mind, what I did, and what I'm going to have to do. The guilt of lying to them was going to haunt me. My mind just kept worrying about what has happened. But this quote kept getting stuck in my mind, "Worrying is stupid, it's like walking around with an umbrella waiting for it to rain." That's what I was doing, but I can't help it.

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