Identity Crisis

Monday, 11.2, Tom

You can do it, Tom.
You win this game
That was the first thing I thought after I woke up.  I was nervous and thought about the identity war. Now I knew why everyone was getting so weird and I was glad I didn't know any of them personally, otherwise it would be a total shock for me.  I regretted making fun of it with my friends.

I realized that all of the problems I had in my life ... getting Claire, feeling guilty for my friends and my annoying sister who was completely devastating me mentally, weren't a problem at all.  One problem, however, was getting scared that a secret would be made public and pushed to play someone else.

My mum seemed to notice that something was wrong with us, but so far she has never really spoken to me about it, so much the better.  When I went to school, Mick and Mandy waved me over and I didn't know what reaction to give, but decided to ignore them completely.  >>What's the matter with him?<<, I heard Mandy whisper.

I sat next to Leo on a bench.  He was all alone.  That was probably his job.  It was so weird to distance myself from Mick and Mandy.
>>How are you?<< he asked.
Besides being a playboy, he was being nice to me and I didn't care at the moment.  >>Shit.<< I said curtly.
  >>Wow what about Al - <<
I followed Leo's gaze and saw Allie.  Her hair was tied in two pigtails and she wore no makeup.  Not even remotely.  She ate a donut and her blue sweater was already very dirty from it.  How long has she been eating a donut?  She wanted to be a model, so she had to be careful.

Still, it was strange to see my fellow human beings change.  I had to get used to their new personality first.  Even my own.  Adjusting these habits overnight was extremely difficult.  But the best wins.  I had to get used to it.

It was probably Allie's job.  She spoke to her best friends Nicole and Olivia.
I just saw how they talked to her and then she ran to the bathroom.

In class I thought of the second task.  We had Mrs. Sparks as our history teacher.  She was around forty, super strict and mean, and the whole school hated her.  I wasn't that good at math myself, and she didn't like me very much either.
>> Okay and who can tell me when the Berlin Wall came down? << she asked.
I had to give my opinion now.
>> Who cares? << I asked as a counter-question and the class started to laugh.

>>This is very important for later, leave the class if you do not want to take part.<<
I didn't feel like detention, so I just left class.

During the break I sat with Leo again and ate my cheese roll.  We chatted a bit and Leo went to get something from the school kiosk while I was sitting here.  Mick and Mandy came to me.  They didn't look pleased.  Their looks were puzzled and slightly angry.

>>What's wrong with you.  Are you now also in this whole Identity Crisis thing?<<, asked Mick in astonishment.  I ignored both of them and looked to the right.
>>Stop it, Tom. We are your friends  You can tell us anything.<<, Mandy assured me.
>>You are wrong.<<, I mumbled.

>>That we are your friends or that you can trust us?<<, asked Mandy.
I didn't answer their question and just waited for them to go away.
>>I have no idea what's going on inside you, but I'm not into drama.<<, said Mick.  >> Come on Mandy, let's go. <<
About time.  That was really uncomfortable.

When I got home, I ate in peace while my mum fiddled with her cell phone and scrolled down.  Her confusing large view of the screen could not be missed and then she looked at me.  >>Tom?  Why were you so disrespectful to Mrs. Sparks today?  You have been expelled from class.  One does not discuss with the teachers.<<
Slowly my strange behavior became noticeable.
>>What's wrong with you?  You are not like that?<<
The only thing I said at the moment was: >>It's complicated!<<
Later I fell asleep.