Identity Crisis

Wednesday, Claire (2)

It got quiet and I interrupted her.
>>Who else is invited? I hope not one of the losers.<<, I finally wanted to know.
>>Tim, Bella and Dan definitely. You must know her.<<, said Scarlett.
>>Dan? The boring one? << I repeated, puzzled. >>I saw him yesterday kissing Nicole.<<
>>Yes, I don't understand why he suddenly belongs to the popular. <<, George wondered, >>And you with us.<<

Ouch. That hit hard, but it was true. The last thing I could think of was hanging out with them. Scarlett laughed and took her thermos and drank from it.
>>Oooh what's in there?<<, asked George.
>>Tea, have a drink.<<, she said.
He drank from it and laughed. >>You carry beer with you to school. Clever!<<

I looked at both of them with big eyes that looked at me confused.
>>Do you want to?<< Scarlett wanted to know.
>>No thanks. I only drink at parties. It's a lot cooler. << I lied.
Claire why do you say that? Well, to get me out of it, I had to do that. I gathered all the courage I had to ask Scarlett if she has time today and she said yes.

We wanted to go shopping to look really cool at the party and on the way Scarlett talked an exaggerated amount. She also mentioned that she had a forged ID and had two tattoos with it and stole something a few times.

While we were in town, she bought five cans of hair dye, lots of make-up and nail polish, and clothes too, and I was beginning to wonder where she got all the money from. I bet she stole it from her parents. It was six o'clock and we got to my place.

My mum greeted us both with a smile. I realized exactly that it was a wrong one. She was probably wondering what was going on here. A shiver ran down my spine and I didn't like to see my mum with that look on her face.

For dinner there was pizza and Scarlett chewed in and told her whole life story for twenty minutes. When Scarlett walked into my room, it looked different than she expected. It was a neat white room with a blackpink poster on the wall.

>>You hear Blackpink?<<, she asked and laughed. >>That's ... not mine. But sweet.<<
Is she seriously making fun of my taste in music?
>>What do you hear? Definitely One Direction or something.<< I replied.
Scarlett laughed and she laughed like a witch. >>Nirvana.<< was all she said.
>>Maybe George was right. You don't belong to us. Your room alone says it all ... <<, she doubted.

I rolled my eyes: >>Do I look like I have money and could paint my room completely black or dark purple?<<, I screeched out of haste.
>>Wow, wow. Chill that was a joke.<<
After a moment of silence we both laughed and died. >>You are cool, Claire.<<
She dyed my hair red and you could see everything completely. I've never done this in my life, but it felt exciting. However, it was also uncomfortable for me.

The hairspray was really good. I put on a black T-shirt and jeans. I wore blood red lipstick and eyeliner with glittery nail polish. I didn't feel comfortable in it, but what should I do.
Scarlett's older brother drove us to the party.

George's villa was right next to Allies and I was sorry she wasn't invited. When we entered the villa, I felt dizzy. There were fifty people, or maybe more, and everyone was staring at us.
>>Claire, Scarlett you look real bombshell. Let's celebrate.<<, cheered George when he came to us.

I wanted to relax first and then go dancing. At least that's what I said to George, but I couldn't even dance. When I looked at the house, I saw that Dan and Liam were there. I sat down and drank water, but that tasted really cool. >>Since when have you been drinking vodka?<< asked a familiar male voice next to me. Crap. I turned right. It was Mick.

>>SINCE WHEN ARE YOU HERE?<< I screeched.
Instead of answering me, he just shouted to Mandy that I was here. It can't get any worse. I liked Tom's friends. They were very personable, but they wanted to know every little detail about everyone and that was just annoying. Especially Mick. I wouldn't even be surprised if he was London School Spy.
>>Claire?<<, Mandy called in amazement and sat on the couch,
>>Don't you avoid parties and alcohol?<<

>>Long story.<<, I replied, annoyed, >>How long have you been here?<< I repeated.
>>Since we weren't friends with Tom anymore.<<, Mandy muttered.
I looked at them confused and didn't know what they were talking about, but I wondered why Mandy said that.

Most of my brain was seething with anger. How can you hate Tom? Did you have an argument?
>>He's not like that. Believe me. It's just...<<
I didn't know how to justify myself. Wait? Why did I justify myself for him in the first place. That's absurd.

>>It's stress.<< I tried to reassure them.
Mick looked at me skeptically: >>Stress?<<
There was an uncomfortable silence for a short time, but Mick interrupted it. I felt like I was being tested. I couldn't let my nervousness show.
>>I know you like Tom, but that doesn't mean that you know him as well as we do.<<

>>He told me, you stupid.<<, I lied. Oh, oh, stop it now. I plunged more and more into the world of secrets and lies. That was probably the point of the identity crisis. That's what I hated at parties. The chance that you will do something there that you regret was very high.

Suddenly I saw George and Scarlett with a bottle of tequila in hand.
>>Come on Claire, let's dance.<< George cheered me up.
I didn't want to, but what should I do?
>>No, maybe I should get drunk.<< I said. I still have that one job to do and drank shots.
George and Scarlett sat with us and we drank. I got addicted to it. I wanted more and more ...