Always//H.S. (Sequel to Alive)

chasing cars

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

lila rose

(present day...february 20th 2018...9:25 am)

"so you just ran away?!?" clara and jameson scream at the same time, clara watching as i stretch, getting ready for a sprint. i'm trying to break my personal record mile. i nod, picking at my lip scab that i have managed to chew apart in the last twenty hours. i don't look up at them but i hear claras signature sigh.

"tulip, you've gotta at least talk to him," she says and my head snaps to her in shock. "what?" i ask and she sits forward, taking her hand off of her belly. i knew i needed to talk to him, i just really didn't want to admit that to myself. i roll my eyes at the look jameson gives me as i crack my knuckles. i don't get why he hates that sound so much. "i just mean you need to clear some things up with him, tulip. you both left on such bad moments and maybe if you guys talk through some things you can be friends," she says and i press my lips together, shaking my head as i tie my shoes, jameson places a band in front of me for my ankles, and i start to do some squats with it.

"i don't wanna be his friend," i lie through my teeth, clara snorting as my cheeks get red, jameson laughing. "i'll fire you," i snap at him and he just throws me my water, it hitting me in the arm before i punch his shoulder. "take your anger out on the track not me," he mumbles, and i smile at him, walking over and helping clara stand from the bench, her waddling beside me as we walk down the few steps to the track, and i smile excitedly. jameson helps clara over the the bench as i set myself up at the starting line, and i wait for jamesons air horn to go off before i'm sprinting as fast as i can.

i usually try and distract myself with something, like reciting a song in my head or listening to music, but it's just me and the silence right now, and my mind was too clouded by him to think of anything else. clara was right, we did end on a bad note, but at the same time i don't want to do that to myself-talking to him i mean. i wouldn't mind just getting the conformation or denial of certain things, but i know that's easier said than done.

"sinclair! stop!" jameson calls out and i frown, my lungs heaving and i walk over there slowly, him frowning at me. "you're already a minute past your record," he frowns and i sigh, sitting on the track as he stands above me, clara watching me closely. 

"you can't keep thinking about him, sinclair," he says, softly kicking my ankle with his foot and i close my eyes, letting my shoulders melt into the ground. "i'm not," i lie again and clara snorts from where she sat, soaking in the sun. "for fucks sake just call the man!" clara says, and i stand from the ground, ignoring the fact that i know she's right and i slap the side of my legs to get them warm again.

"start the time over,"

_________
here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see...

(present day... february 20th 2018...12:30 pm)

"...meeting at eight tomorrow morning with the board of sales about getting us a spot in small boutiques around town," i listen to journee as she drags on my endless list of things to do. i pick at my nails, knowing i'll pop one of the acrylics off before i get home.

it's a bad and expensive habit.

"got it?" journee says when the phone rings, and i nod, sending her back to her desk before i notice deltas familiar number, picking up the phone and holding it against my ear as i sign into the computer.

"sinclair," i mumble, delta already starting to talk. "i just forwarded you an email, check it asap. i'm on my way now," delta says and i pop my gum as she hangs up, the line ringing dead. i put the phone down, bringing one of my knees to my chest as i take a sip of my coffee, cringing at the bubblegum coffee taste. i will never deny my love for coffee, even when it comes to a cup of instant coffee-it's just so fucking good.