Always//H.S. (Sequel to Alive)

lullaby

You'll fall asleep with your head on the grass
And your eyes so heavy, they'll weight you down when you laugh
You ran to me and said "baby, I can't rest"
I told you no one in this world has either, we're blessed

h.

(present day...april 28th 2018...8:00 pm)

her lips were carved into mine as my back pressed down into the grass below the blanket from the back of lucille, and i grin as her hips lift off of the back of the blanket, reaching out to keep her lips against mine, pulling away and smiling down at me, and all i can see is her pretty blonde hair and those long eyelashes of hers before she laid back against the blanket beside me, us both quiet, too absorbed in each other.

"you're so pretty," i mumble, and she grins, half of her burger and her whole fries laid next to her, and as much as i wish she would finish it, i know it's a start, and for that i'm proud of her. she just scrunches her nose, turning on her side so she had more of a closeness to me, and i wrap my hands around her hips. "have you talked to your mom lately?" lila asks and i lift my eyes from the small space of skin between her shirt and leggings, showing her defined waist, and i rub my thumb in a circle over her skin. "not in a while...don't really wanna talk about gemma right now, yanno?" i say, shoving my head closer to her, and she frowns at me.

"have you told your mom that?" i knew she was going to say that, and i feel my hands sweat, shaking my head and she hums. "i think you should talk to your mom, love," she whispers, and i stare at the big trees behind her, knowing she was right.

if i was going to be honest, i was terrified, this wasn't like me. i've never been able to stay away from mum from this long, and it's frightening to me that one bag of drugs can do so much to ruin a family, my family. it worried me even more now that Lilas started to make comments on it and pay attention to it like she is right now, i don't know what i would do if it ruined us more than it has already. i knew i wouldn't let it get to that point at all, i knew it, but at the same time it scared me, because we both said that last time.

we leave for italy in less than five days, and knowing she would have to see me around my family again made me more unsettled than anything. it was going to be awkward, and there would probably be talk about drugs and stuff from mum, and i would be fine with that, but bringing lila along means she has to see that too.

"harry," lila's voice cuts through the thickness in my head, and i feel her hand fall on my cheek, and i stare at the sky now, not wanting to even think about what would happen if i did that to her again. "stop, harry...youre overthinking again," her sweet voice whispers into my ear, and she pulls herself up and over my body, laying between my legs, and her lips press slowly down onto mine, and i sigh into them, relaxing my hands on her back.

"m' just worried," i mumble between desperate kisses and she pulls away, shaking her head down at me. "it's gonna be fine, harry...do you want me to call your mom?" she whispers, and i shake my head.

"i'll do it, i promise,"

i just didn't know when.

____

"lila?"

my voice seems to echo into her house as loki crowds my feet, meowing up at me as i set a bag of groceries down, my eyes taking the white house for a sign of my girl. it was pretty early still, and after the late night we had at my house, i expected her to still be sleeping, but i frown when i don't hear a response, starting to climb up the stairs.

"lavender?" i whisper, knocking at the door to her room and i hear her groan on the other side of the door, and i grin as i open it, seeing her buried under the covers, the tv playing some sort of movie, and i slip my shoes off, her eyes still closed, but i knew she was awake. a pair of her leggings and one of her workout tops were discarded on the floor and i grin at the way her hair was still in its small ponytail at the top of her hair.