My Last Hope

9

Warnings:
-Usage drugs/alcohol
-Throwing up

Clay's POV

As soon as I was sure George left, I stood back up to go to the uncrowned place next to the park. I didn't want my dad to know I was home since I lied about that and quickly walked off.

I looked around me, making sure no one was here to check on me. I didn't see anyone near me and started walking to the place I had to be.

Yesterday was a terrible day. After I used all the drugs and alcohol, I planned on waiting to get sober again. I was decently sober when I suddenly bumped into the person who caused me my trauma. I got beaten up because I said something they didn't like and then just went to sleep while being extremely hungover again.

I looked at the drugs in my bag, I really needed it right now. My body was too sore to run so I walked as fast as I could to the place I usually did drugs. No one had ever come here so far and I really liked to keep it that way too.

I sat down on the ground, grabbing the bag with shaking hands. I needed drugs right now, not only to stop the memories, regrets and fears, but I was getting really addicted and needed more.

I grabbed the little bag with the drugs in it and spread it on a small plastic bag in my school bag. I didn't doubt any longer and leaned in, closing one of the sides of my nose as I sniffed the drugs.

It didn't take really long before I felt incredibly happy and drowsy at the same time. The feeling of being high had never felt better than it did now and I was laughing about nothing while I drank alcohol at the same time.

After a while of feeling extremely happy and euphoric the feeling went away. It left me really tired, I couldn't think very well and my heart and breathing rhythm went really slow as I just stared in front of me while drinking some alcohol.

Before I even realised, I drank the whole bottle again and felt extremely nauseous. I lifted myself up and sat down on my knees as I started to breathe a little bit faster.

⚠️ Throwing up

I leaned forwards as I had to throw up again. I wasn't feeling well at all and kept throwing up, until I didn't remember anything anymore. I couldn't tell if I passed out or forgot what happened and just fell asleep.

⚠️ Over

I woke up hours later and slowly sat up as I looked around me. I couldn't remember why I was laying down on the floor but when I saw the alcohol, I knew I probably drank way too much again.

I sighed softly as I tried to stand up, but my whole body was so incredibly weak that I collapsed again.

I had a really bad headache, all my muscles hurt and I felt just really bad in general. Really bad stomach pains caused me to sob softly and I looked around me. The sunlight was hurting my eyes and I sniffed softly since my nose seemed runny.

I couldn't remember what I used, but I knew it wasn't something like marijuana. I started thinking back as far as I could, suddenly remembering the combination drugs I got. I must have tried that along with a lot of alcohol.

An hour later, I finally managed to stand up. I had thrown up around four times again and still had a nauseous feeling in my stomach. I was having really bad cramps as well and my headache was so bad that I could barely keep my eyes open.

I slowly walked home, I had never walked slower. My muscles were hurting so much and my heart was constantly missing multiple beats, just to beat very fast or slow after that.

I sighed softly and entered my place, walking into my house slowly. My dad was sitting on the couch and he turned around to look at me when I came in.

'You look awful,' he said. 'What did you do?'

'Just really tired,' I whispered. 'I'm going to sleep. I think I might be sick.'

He didn't reply and I quickly walked upstairs as I laid down on my bed. Even though I was feeling like absolute shit, I really wanted more of the drugs he gave me.

I grabbed my phone, but had to lay it down again. The light was so bright that it hurt my eyes and I calmed my eyes for a little, opening my phone again on the lowest brightness.

You
Can I have some more of the drugs you gave me?

Miguel
Yeah, if you steal again. I'm busy today, come to the park tomorrow. Make sure you drink a bit beforehand because I know you're going to be scared.

You
I drank way too much the past three days already, but okay. I'll drink again.

Miguel
Tomorrow at three okay?

I answered him shortly and laid my phone back down. I didn't want to steal, but I needed drugs. It wasn't that bad, I just stole some food. I wouldn't go to jail for that, right?

I got really sad again and felt tears coming up in my eyes as I lifted my hand to my face so I could suck my thumb again. I turned around to grab my bear and held it under the sheets so my dad wouldn't see if he suddenly came in.

I slept until dinner and my dad brutally woke me by slamming my door. I went downstairs and sat at the table as I looked at my dad.

'I'm so sorry, dad. I feel really sick. I don't want to eat.'

'You haven't been eating in days. It's really annoying me now, I'm cooking here all the time and you don't even take a bite of it. I can just cook for myself next time and I will. Don't complain if you want food.'

I nodded slowly and stood up to walk back to my room. I laid down on my bed and started sucking my thumb again as I held my bear. I ended up falling asleep for the rest of the day and night.

1057 words