30 Ways to Piss Off The Harry Potter Cast [Watty Awards 2011]

30 Ways to Piss Off Harry Potter

30 Ways to Piss Off Harry Potter

1) Poke his forehead. 

2) Attempt to speak Parseltongue. 

3) Invite him to tea. Also invite Umbridge, Snape, Malfoy Jr. and Sr., Bellatrix and Voldemort. 

4) Reinstate Fudge as Minister of Magic. 

5) Wax eloquent about how wonderful Fudge is as Minister. 

6) Ask him if he's heard anymore voices in the walls. 

7) Tell him you're planning on naming your firstborn son Tom Riddle. 

8) Assure him that Cedric turned out to be a fine vampire. 

9) Insult Sirius. 

10) Detail the extent of his mother's relationship with Snape. 

11) Insult Ron or Hermione. 

12) Ask him if Voldemort is his alter ego. Then ask how his therapy for multiple personalities disorder is going. 

13) Ask him if he's bipolar. 

14) Ask him to help you get your locket back. 

15) Tell him you made a horcrux. 

16) Dress up as Voldemort and choose the worst moments possible to randomly pop out at him, grinning in a creepy way. 

17) While dressed as Voldemort, dramatically reach out, touch his forehead, and waggle your eyebrows suggestively while saying, "I can *touch* you..." 

18) Ask him how Sirius is doing. 

19) Ask him to help you retrieve a prophecy. 

20) Show him your new mongrel of a dog and announce that it's name is Sirius. Proceed to complain loudly about how it's not as good as a purebred, but that a mongrel is better than nothing. 

21) Scream "You must not tell lies!" everytime he opens his mouth. 

22) Tell him Draco Malfoy has a better chance with Cho and Ginny. 

23) Tell him about the upcoming Triwizard Tournament, and inform him that you entered his name for him. 

24) Buy an old, tattered diary, and hand it to him secretively. Ask him to keep a *very* close eye on it, as it's a *special* diary. Make sure the pages are blank. 

25) Sign him up as a Potions apprentice, in training to be the Potions professor. 

26) Attempt to shove a bezoar down his throat. 

27) Buy a Dumbledore figurine, use Avada Kedavra on it, and ask him if it looks any different. 

28) Dress up as a Dementor and hide in his closet. 

29) Draw a Dark Mark on his arm while he's asleep. 

30) Whenever he asks a question, answer it like it's the dumbest question ever, and say, "What, have you been living in a cupboard or something?"

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Upcoming: 30 Ways to Piss Off a Death Eater, 30 Ways to Piss Off Hermione Granger, and 30 Ways to Piss Off Dobby.

Wow guys! I didn't expect this to be so popular! This whole series of lists literally started with me being bored. Amazing, ain't it? Thanks for all the great feedback! Refavoment! (if you don't know what that means...well, you can find out in my fanfic, Escaping Darkness. :)