30 Ways to Piss Off The Harry Potter Cast [Watty Awards 2011]

30 Ways to Piss Off Death Eaters

A/N: Hey guys! So, here’s the list of upcoming 30 Ways to Piss Off…

Dobby, Uncle Vernon, Dumbledore, Mrs. Black (I had a few ideas for her :D), Percy Weasley, Mrs. Weasley, Ginny Weasley, Lupin, Sirius, and an assortment of characters that I could only think of a few ways for, including, but not limited to: Luna Lovegood, the Weasley twins, Crabbe and Goyle, Neville Longbottom, Tonks, Fudge, Pansy Parkinson, Cedric Diggory, Hagrid, Viktor Krum, Fleur, Bill Weasley, Colin Creevey, Moaning Myrtle, Peeves, McGonagall, Flitwick, Trelawney, Lockhart, Quirrel, Mad-Eyed Moody, Wormtail, and Nagini.

Note: Some of those might become a list of their own, if I can think of enough ways to piss them off. :) Creativity is hard though. Oh, and watch for a parody that I have in the works. Dunno when I’ll actually do it (I suddenly had like 5 different ideas, one for a Snape fanfic, and others for parodies), but it will get done. :D Ciao!

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30 Ways to Piss Off Death Eaters (featuring Dolohov as the individual that appears in several of these)

1)      Say Voldemort’s name.

2)      Think Voldemort’s name.

3)      Say Voldemort’s name in a different language (yes, Klingon counts).

4)      Sing Voldemort’s name.

5)      Dance around headquarters singing, “Voldemort, Voldemort, ooh Voldy, Voldy, Voldemort” to the tune of “Lollipop”.

6)      Come up with another song using Voldemort’s name. (i.e. Who’s the big bad wolf in town? Voldie, Voldie, he’s the man! Who’s the greatest Dark lord ‘round? Voldie, Voldie, he’s the man!)

7)      Rap Voldemort’s name. (i.e. From the V to the O to the D-I-E, it’s Voldie, Voldie, my H-O-M-I-E. He’s my home-dawg, my man, my homie-g-dawg.)

8)      Tattoo/draw a Dark mark on your arm and show it for all to see.

8)   Convince him that you speak Parseltongue. Then tell him that Nagini wants him, with a smirk on your face.

9)      Rip a hole in the seat of his robes so that he doesn’t notice, and charm all of his underwear an embarrassing color, patterned with hearts or an equally mortifying print.

10)   Ask him how it feels to know you’ve been bested by a kid for the past 17 years. First as a baby, now as a teen.

11)   Ask him why he was so afraid of Dumbledore before he died. C’mon, the man was eleventy something years old!

12)   Then taunt him about how Draco Malfoy, a kid, bested Dumbledore, while he, an adult and a full Death Eater, couldn’t.

13)   Threaten to tell Voldemort about his love affair with Harry Potter.

14)   Hide Nagini in his bed sheets.

15)   Go around wearing a t-shirt that says, “Who’s yo’ daddy?” Make sure the picture is a baby wearing glasses with a scar on his forehead.

16)   Comment about his great choice on people to follow. Say, “I mean, getting defeated by a baby, and failing to kill said baby after he grows up? That takes skill right there…”

17)   Ask, “How’s the weather down by Voldemort’s ass?”

18)   Wonder aloud, “Is it really an elite group if you have people like Bellatrix, Crouch Jr., and Wormtail? Inspiring examples, all of them.”

19)   Hide his mask.

20)   Better yet, bedazzle his mask. Charm the sequins so they can’t be removed.

21)   Draw/tattoo a lightning bolt scar on his forehead while he’s sleeping.

22)   Paint his Dark mark pink while he’s sleeping.

23)   Then add glitter.

24)   Draw “I *Heart* HP” underneath it.

25)   Slip Polyjuice into his drink, complete with some of Harry’s hair.

26)   Replace Harry’s hair with Dumbledore’s.

27)   Ask him if he’ll give you a piggyback ride. After all, your feet hurt something awful, and he’s used to bending over anyways, right?

28) Tell him to shut up if he complains about being sore (probably because of the Cruciatus). Then say, “You wouldn’t have this problem if you weren’t up so late. Next time, just tell him no!”

28)  Every time he says, “Yes, Master”, catcall and wink.

29)  Slap him. :D Just kidding.

30)   Did you notice there were two #28s? How about the two #8s? :D