2 a.m. thoughts

love

he had this one question he had always wanted to ask her just one question that had haunted his blissful dreams."why dont you believe in love?"

she looked at him with bewildered eyes, wondering how someone could be so straight forward. she still looked at him, unable to say anything.

"tell me." he demanded.he had imagined her answers in his mind.each and every possible answer she could ever give.but nothing in his wildest dreams had ever prepared him for what he was about to hear.

"its easier if i don't."she replied quietly and he nodded,encouraging her to continue."you see,love is dangerous.it slowly seeps into your soul like poison and it hits every inch of your fibre.it either kills you or leaves you mentally scarred for the rest of your life.and the worst part is that the choice is never yours. it takes you back by surprise." just like you did, she wanted to add but she decided against it.

"but isnt that the beauty of love?the way you forget everything.your past,your troubles,your addictions. i think thats why love is beautiful. it makes you forget about your problems and the future even if its for the shortest time."he told her.
he was determined to change her point of view.he wanted her to know that everything didn't have to be so dark and blunt;that everything could actually make sense.

she let out a silent laugh. "you think love is beautiful?well guess what,it isnt.love is useless.its just some piece of bullshit created by some miserable asshole.love is murderous.you lose your sanity when you're in love and everything you do is controlled by your feelings.its completely based off of the top of your heads.you lose yourself in the things you love."

"but you find yourself too."

"only the lucky ones do and honestly i haven't had much of luck till now."

he took a deep breath and said,"well,i guess maybe thats the reason our paths crossed."

and with that he walked out,not even glancing back once to look at her reaction.but little did he know that she was smiling.

•this was an excerpt from a clintasha au i was writing. they're my parents tbh.•