Broken Cycle

Chapter Four

The next morning, I checked my phone. People were saying horrible things about me online still. All on Facebook.

Emma is such a slut!!! Who else saw her cheat on Liam last night??

Comments: ikr?! I was like, "oh no!" Liam'll dump her hoe ass
She's not so bad y'all. She may not have cheated
No she cheated. She was kissing Liam, then Ben drover her home. Shady af.
She's a hoe anyway. Liam can do so much better!

I exited out of Facebook and got ready for the day. Even though it was Sunday, I wanted to look good in case I decided I wanted to do something. Carrie was at church, so I couldn't talk to her.

My phone buzzed and Liam's name and picture showed up. I swiped to answer and put him on speaker so I could brush my teeth.

"Hey, babe," I said.

"Mornin, babe. Hey, so I saw some stuff online. I mean, I don't believe it, but just to clarify, you didn't cheat, right?" He asked.

"Of course not. I barely know that Ben guy," I said.

"Okay, good. Just thought I'd clear the air. So what are you doing today?" He asked.

"Dunno yet. What about you?" I asked.

"Probably nothin. Mom says she wants to do stuff together, but we'll see," he said.

"Your mom is nice. I think she'll stick by her word," I said.

"Yeah, she will. I just don't know if I want to," he said.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because she asks too many questions and shit. Like, she needs to get off my case. Well, hey, talk to you later. Bye," he hung up.

I put my phone in my pocket and went to the kitchen. I rummaged through the pantry and refrigerator for breakfast food.

"Morning, Emma," Mom said.

"Morning, Mom," I said not turning around.

"Going somewhere?" She asked.

"No," I shut the pantry door. "Just wanted to get dressed just in case I wanted to."

"Well, your grandma is on her way," she said.

"Grandma Rose?" I asked.

"Yes," she laughed.

"Cool, what time?" I asked.

"She should be here within thirty minutes," Mom said.

"Awesome!" I smiled and went to the living room.

Grandma Rose was the best grandma there ever was. Grandpa Aden was also cool, but Grandma Rose was just awesome. She always was able to make me feel better about myself. Sometimes I wonder what life was like for my mom with her. And why it was so different now.

The doorbell rang and Grandma and Grandpa came in and Mom hugged them. Mason came out of his room to hug them and I waited till they were done to hug them. We all sat in the living room and Grandma and Grandpa were telling their latest and greatest travel story. They'd just come from Italy.

"So what have you two been doing?" Grandma Rose looked at me and Mason.

"Not much," Mason shrugged.

"Oh whatever," Mom said. "He's been doing very well in school and started dating a really nice girl named Jamie."

Mason proceeded to tell our grandparents about Jamie and I tuned it out.

"And Emma?" Grandma looked at me.

"School's fine and still single," I said. Mom still didn't know about Liam.

Mason looked at me and I gave him the look.

"Emma, let's take a walk," Grandma Rose stood.

I stood and followed her out the front door and we walked around the neighborhood.

"What's going on?" She asked me.

"Nothing," I said.

"Something," she said.

I didn't say anything. I repressed all my feelings into my feelings suitcase and zipped it up.

"You know, I know you have problems with your mom. You feel she's being over protective and paranoid. But--"

"She was hurt just like you. I'm at the same age y'all were and now the stakes are even higher. Don't hate my mom for loving me. She's doing the best she can. Yeah, I know," I said.

"Then why do you give her such a hard time?" Grandma Rose asked me.

"I have a life I want to live and she won't let me," I said.

"To protect you. Your grandpa and I did everything we could and it still wasn't enough," she said.

"Yeah, well, it wasn't y'all's fault. It was the guy's fault," I said.

"Emma," Grandma Rose sat on a bench. "Talk to me. What's bothering you?"

I sat next to her and looked down. Should I tell her about how I felt like my mom didn't truly love me since I was a rape child? Should I tell her that kids were bullying me? Should I tell her I felt like a disappointment since Mason is so great? No. I zipped up my feelings suitcase and put a lock on it.

"I just haven't been sleeping well," I said. It wasn't a lie. I woke up three times a night every night.

"Not sleeping well doesn't have anything to do with pulling all these rebellious stunts that you do," she said. "You think you fool your mom each time? She knows. She used to do the same thing for a bit, but not like this."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I crossed my arms.

"She knows you went to a party last night. She also knows you're hiding something from her, but doesn't know what it is," she said.

"Can we go home now?" I stood.

Grandma Rose stood and we went home.