Unexpected love (Completed)

Chapter 27.

Hoseok's POV 

When I opened my eyes, my head was hurting like hell. 

What happened yesterday? 

Or for that matter, what has happened the last week? 

I closed my eyes again as it felt like my head was actually burning. 

I opened them again, but slower this time and I noticed that Joon was sleeping/seating besides my bed. 

That made me asks myself again... What happened yesterday? 

Why was Joon here? 

"Joon?" I asks, carefully. I didn't want to scare him. 

Joon opened his eyes when he heard me and smiled a little at me while sitting straight on the chair. 

"Hey Hobi." He said. Now that I could see his eyes, it looks like he's been crying. 

What did I do? 

"What did I do?" I asks, unsure if I wanted to know the answer. 

He sighs as he looked down. 

"You don't remember?" I shook my head and that made me stress out more. 

If Joon stayed here the night, then it means that I was really bad yesterday. 

"You- You tried to kill yourself Hobi." What? 

I know that I had those thoughts for a very long time in my head, but I never actually tried that before. Because I always think of the pain I could cause the rest of the people that surrounds me. 

I don't want to cause them pain. 

But I guess the me from yesterday, didn't care anymore. 

"Oh..." I look down at my hands, not been able to look at him. He must be so disappointed in me. 

"I came because you texted me, asking 'should I do it' and since you've been very distant lately, I got worried, as well as Jin." 

"Jin? He was here as well?" That made me look at him. 

He nodded and I put my hands in my face, hating myself for putting them in this situation. We already had enough going on. 

"I'm so sorry." I said and Joon shook his head. 

"You shouldn't be saying sorry to me, nor anyone else apart from yourself Hobi." Wow, that phrase right there, it got me. 

I felt some tears wanting to spill from my eyes but I wipe them away. I don't want him to see me cry. 

I don't think he has seen me cry. Or at least not because I'm sad. They've seen me cry but out of happiness at concerts and all of that stuff, but never because I'm sad. 

"Hobi, it's okay to cry. You need to let yourself feel sadness once in a while. That is how you can balance your life." Joon said, as he put a hand on my shoulder. 

When I looked back at him I couldn't take it anymore and I cried. 

I cried because I let them all down. 

I cried because I actually tried to take my life away as if I wasn't grateful for it all. 

I cried because Emily is still at the hospital. 

I cried because I couldn't visit Jungkook at the hospital. 

I cried because I disappointed everyone. 

And because I'm in pain. 

Joon's POV 

Watching Hobi cry out of pain might be one of the hardest things I've had to witness. 

He is broken and we didn't noticed. 

But we have to try and think in the present. Now that we know he is in pain, we can help him. 

We are going to help him as best as we can. 

If he is like this right now, I'm not sure he should know about the trail today. 

It might make it worse. 

But I also feel like he will hate himself if he wasn't there for me because I never told him about it. 

What I've been trying to avoid, I have to face it. 

I have to tell him. 

"Hobi... I know this might make you feel worse, but please understand when I tell you that it isn't your fault, okay? What I'm about to tell you, it isn't your fault." I said, careful with my words. I feel like he is going to break. When he nodded and tried to calm down, I couldn't back out now. "Um, today I have a trail, because I killed Jungkook's father. Today they will decide if I should go to jail or not." 

Of course he cried again. 

Fuck. I shouldn't of told him. 

"Oh my God." I heard him whisper under his breath as he kept crying. 

"Hobi, it's not your fault." 

"It doesn't matter how much you tell me it isn't. I shouldn't of called any of the boys and I shouldn't of called you either. I should of dealt this by myself so maybe this wouldn't of been happening. I made you all be in this mess because I wanted to be the fucking hero." 

"No. YOU wanted to help Jungkook and Emily, that is totally understandable. Imagine if you didn't? What would've happen with Jungkook? He might still be living with his horrible father that might even begin to hurt him, he might of never know he had a sister or a mother. You helped him Hoseok, and you helped his family." 

"But I put you all in danger." 

"That doesn't matter anymore Hoseok. The important thing here is that Jungkook is better, I'm sure Emily will get better as well in time, maybe I won't go to jail, so it's fine. We are going to be fine and you did help them in the end." 

I'm not sure if I'm convincing him, who knows what he is thinking, but at least I'm trying. 

"Can I come to the trail?" I heard Hoseok asks and I looked at him and nodded. 

"Of course, the rest of the guys will be there as well." 

And with that we were both silenced again. 

"Thank you for staying with me and telling me about the trail." Hoseok suddenly said. 

"I'm sorry I didn't told you earlier." 

"No I get it, you thought it would make me feel worse." He replied. 

I nodded and was thankful that he wasn't mad that I didn't told him before. 

Well, maybe things will get better from here. 

I really hope things will get better from here.