the start

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I grew up in a nice home. My life was never too much. I wasn't happy. I wasn't sad. It was normal. Nothing ever happened in my neighborhood that much. I never understood much.

I lived with my mother and stepdad up till I was thirteen. I had step siblings. My father never wanted a child . I was never mad at him. What was there to be mad about. They were young. So much had changed in such a short time.

I was thirteen when my mother had died. A murder. Wrong time and wrong place. I remember not crying. I didn't know what to feel. I lost something so special. But it didn't break me yet. It broke him. My stepdad. He did everything but heal. Which only led me to living back with my father.

I remember seeing her lifeless body in the casket. The funeral came and went. And in seconds my father finally had to become a father. He was always good at doing...nothing.  

In hours the streets changed. So many hours of driving . A few stops. A few snacks. A few pumps of gas. My life before was so simple and easy. I had everything I wanted. Even if I didn't... want them. But I was thirteen.
 
We had went through a busy city into a neighbor hood where I would start living. Where I would start to here gunshots all the time. It was never sunny. Not even the slightest. It was gloomy and weary. The place was always quiet and cold. Yet I couldn't complain.

There was a middle school very near by where I had attended. Where I wore nice things and stood apart from the crowd of young kids who smoked and drank. I didn't judge. I just minded my business. That's where I met Alesia. Pronounced alysha. She was outgoing and fun. There were so many cliques and groups. We always hung out. My father loved her.

Just not her family.

She was my only friend.

We would go to this ice cream shop at the corner of a block. Before it became a liquor like the rest of the corner shops. I had ordered ice cream for her and myself since she had to use the restroom. I had sat down and took a picture or the ice creams. I always had taken pictures since certain things looked pretty in my head.

She was taking long so I wanted to check on her. Yet I couldn't. Everything had started speeding up. Time was going so slow but so quick as he walked in. A guy. In all black. I knew he knew I was there but he didn't care. He went up to the cashier. The cashier handed him a bag. I was paying attention to the tattoo on the back of his neck. A snakes head. That seemed to trail down his back. He said some things to the cashier.

I couldn't move. I wanted to scream or run. But I sat there watching him out a bullet through his head.

Alesia screamed. A short scream. But I didn't turn my head. I was scared I'd  he next. But I sat there. Quiet.

He turned to face me. He looked 19 at most. His green eyes would try finding mine. Try finding something. I did that same. But he had no emotion. Clearly I didn't as well. There were police sirens. He eyed at me before walking away.

He walked.

He walked.

As if he didn't just murder someone.

"Serena!"

Serena Anastasia.

I close the journal entry marking my place before looking at the door. My dad whose been doing sad things for the past two years stands there. Slowly opening the door for Alesia.

She walks in with purple bonnet that holds in her freshly done braids. A suitcase in her hand hinting she will be staying here for awhile.

"Alesia...is here. Again." My dad says calmly and tiredly. She rolls her eyes knowing he's exhausted of her but in a loving way.  

"Thank you Mr. Damien Corby for letting me stay...again." She says in the same tone. He rolls his eyes and closes my bedroom door. I laugh and lock the journal in my drawer. Me and my dad aren't extremely close but he cares. He's usually working since he's a cop. He loves this place and I know he wants to move for me but won't. He's lived here his entire life so I guess I have to deal.

"We're going to a back to school party this week okay." She states sitting on my bed. I shake my head no.

"We're fifteen. We should I don't know. Make sundaes?" I precise. She shakes her head no.

She's always around but I never mind. She lives with her brother. Whose twenty two. He takes care of her for the most part. Her eldest brother is in jail for life. Then the middle boy was murdered. She's the youngest. Her parents weren't ever there. My father knows what her brother do. But that's the only time he keeps his mouth shut. I know he does it for me. Which I'm thankful for.

"My brother will be there. It's some older people, and upperclassman it'll be fun and I promise I won't get drunk."

I look outside at the window. It's already seven but almost pitch black. The streets are quiet like usual. No one really comes out of there house out here. But I would understand why. Even my sad says never to hang around the wrong crowd. So it's just me and her. She had other friends. She's known I guess. I'm just here. 

"Your father will be out either way." She winks. I smile and huff.

"Fine." I give in. She smiles and hugs me. First party. About to become sophomores in a month. We end up talking about my birthday. Watching a show but she sleeps quickly. I get out of bed and go back to finishing what I started. 

I remember how crazy that day was. I remember writing down a statement and repeating the same story hundreds of times. Nothing happened though. Until a month later. I heard he got life. He was eighteen. I cried that day. Not for him. But finally relaxing my mother was really dead. I just witnessed a murder. That's how she died. I hated him. He killed dozens. I never knew someone so young would commit so many crimes and never get caught.

I look back outside at my window.

I was thirteen.

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