Find Me

26. Trust

"Stay away from Dan," are the first words I hear out of Hero's mouth the moment I enter our house. I still needed time to cool off from Hero so I asked Jamie to drive me home. Luckily she said yes. Hero definitely wasn't happy about it but he let it slide. He also picked Henry up right after he dropped me off, he's upstairs sleeping I assume.

Kicking my shoes off, my eyes flash up to him. "Why should I?" I snap back.

His face grows a bit red, "because I'm telling you to."

I stalk towards him, "and where has that ever gotten me? You telling me to do things, huh?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" He looks down at me with a dark expression. But I also notice the hurt in his eyes. I'm glad, I said that for a reason.

My heart feels like it's in my throat as my hands shake. "Nothing," I scoff as I roll my eyes, turning away I go to walk off but he catches my arm.

"Don't walk away from me," he growls in my ear. His grip on me is firm but not too tight, he's always been cautious like that, even when he's mad.

"I can do whatever the fuck I want." I bite back and try to yank my arm away from him but with no success.

Before I can even fathom what's happening, I'm pinned against the wall with Hero's hand wrapped around my throat, pressing lightly. "You sure about that? It seems as if I have all the power, baby." He whispers in my ear and leans away just enough so that I can see him smirk. His other hand comes up to caress my cheek as his eyes drink me in like it's the first time he's looking at me. "You're so beautiful—I hate fighting with you." He puts his face in my neck, taking deep breaths.

"I don't like fighting with you either," I mumble and run a hand through his hair while the other comes around his shoulders to hold him tightly. "Just- please, tell me why you don't want me talking to Dan, he's the director after all."

How we can go from yelling at each other to being cuddled up against a wall is beyond me.

"Jo." He sighs.

"Hero. You know I won't listen unless you give me a good reason." Hero pulls back to look me in my eyes.

"It's not my place to tell you, it's Jamie's. She will tell you when she's ready." His eyes try to convey a message to me.

Something in my mind seems to click in place when he says those words, "oh, okay." I furrow my brows and look down, a few theories run over in my mind, all of them making me feel disgusted.

"Mommy!" Henry exclaims from the bottom of the stairs. He's dressed in matching Spider-Man pajamas while his hair sticks up in different places.

"Love bug!" He runs towards me, I pick him up in my arms and squeeze him tight. "How're you, bug?" I ask him, genuinely curious.

"Good, why were you and daddy arguin wif each ofer?" He has yet to master how to pronounce 'th'.

"Uh-" it dawns on me. I never wanted my kids to hear me argue with their dad, no matter what. I remember as a kid, going from crying to just blocking my parents out like a background noise when they'd scream at each other. And now that's what we are doing to Henry. On top of that we are always so busy doing things that we never spend time with him. "I'm so sorry, baby." I just say and pull him into me tighter. "We won't argue again," I make that empty promise to him, hoping to sooth him in some way, but more so trying to sooth myself.

Looking up past Henry, there Hero stands, watching us with tears in his eyes. Slightly raising one of my hands from Hens back, I beckon Hero over, he takes the invitation and quickly wraps his arms around the both of us.

"Why are you guys being so weird?" Henry's high pitched voice giggles.

"We just missed you, buddy," Hero tells him before tickling his tummy. "We will be spending lots more time with you."
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A week later...

"You have to go to school, Henry," I sigh as I walk into the large building, his tiny hand in mine. Ever since having the school talk with him a month ago he's been throwing a fit about going and it was just a few days ago I had to try and remind him of it.

"But nana said she could just teach me!" He still protests. Mentally I roll my eyes at my mothers offers, constantly telling my son things before me.

I kneel down in front of him and place my hands on either side of his face. "I want you to make friends and have fun. Nana, papa, grammie and gramps can't be your only friends." I try to explain calmly.

"But they're cool!" He throws his small arms up with a pout. Though his arms are small he's growing unusually tall for a boy his age. Just how his father has always been.

"That's enough, please, just give it a chance." I stare deeply into his mismatched eyes.

"I thought you and daddy said you'd spend more time with me," he looks at the ground with tears in his eyes and his lips in a pout.

Placing my forefinger under his chin I raise his face up, "we have been, haven't we? Every day we've spent it together since, and besides this is only for a few hours, both me and daddy will be back later to get you and we can celebrate the first day by going to have a picnic, how's that sound?" It saddens me that he thinks this is us not wanting to spend time with him, but he has to understand that he has to go to school.

"Really good!" He suddenly exclaims in excitement.

"Good, now repeat back to be what I told you earlier."

"If someone is being mean stand up for myself, tell the teacher then tell mama and daddy when I get home."

"That's my boy."
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"Dropping them off for their very first day of school is so sad isn't it?" I hear once I exit the large school building.

Looking to the side my teary eyes widen. Yeah, I did start crying once I walked him into the room, at that point I was ready to just take him back home and teach me myself. But him running over to a group of micro sized boys to immediately introduce himself stopped me. Such a people person just like Hero.

There leaning against the side of the building is Dan. "The first time I dropped Jamie off was incredibly hard," behind his eyes holds something so disgusting that I want to puke.

Note from author:

Yoooooo how're you all today?

Comments, thoughts, theories?

You know you love me xoxo,
Zoë