First Heartbreak

4

I fixed my blanket and turned to the other side, facing the window. The bright moonbeam illuminated the whole room and it was either that that's making me restless or my mind that's not at peace.

My friends were all asleep, their soft snores filling the room. They're probably too tired from London's party and still jet-lagged.

I've been trying for almost an hour now to sleep given that I wasn't able to sleep properly during our flight. Plus, the more I stay awake, the more my mind wanders off to matters I don't want to think about.

To be exact, my mind tries to wander off to that certain someone I've been avoiding all night.

I heaved a deep sigh and got up. There's no point in forcing myself to sleep. I'll probably end up frustrated.

I took some hair ties and tied my long hair into a bun. I then rummaged through my bag and took my AirPods and phone.

Tiptoeing, I was able to get out of our room without making any noise. I didn't want to disturb their sleep.

London's family's chateau is palace-like. Everything about it screams elegance and sophistication. I can't believe that Xavion and Xaviell actually grew up here!

Strike one, Vanilla!

Mariin akong napapikit nang mapagtanto ang naisip. Napailing na lang ako at dahan-dahang bumaba ng hagdan. May kaunting ilaw pa namang nakabukas kaya hindi naman ganoon kadilim. May parte rin sa mala-mansyon nilang bahay na gawa sa kristal kaya nakakapasok ang sinag ng buwan na nagpapakinang sa mga mamahalin nilang mga muwebles.

Nang makarating sa unang palapag ay saka ko kinalikot ang phone at saka pinatugtog ang restless nights playlist ko. Sa mga pagkakataon na hindi ako makatulog ay Spotify playlists ko lang ang solusyon dito. Minsan, pwede ring tsaa pero ayaw ko nang mang-abala pa rito.

I found my way to the garden, then sitting on the swing. The cool breeze hitting my face and the surrounding plants were enough to calm me down. My encounter with the man I refuse to think about has surely disrupted my peace of mind.

It's during times like this that makes me just want to go back to Aldea Blanca—in the comforts of my cottage, to be exact. But then, wala na akong babalikan. My safe haven has been burned to ruins. 

I shook my head and tried to shrug those misery-inducing thoughts. I don't like the feeling of my chest tightening. It's suffocating.

Nanatili ako roon sa swing, muntik nang makatulog. Nagising lang ang diwa ko nang makarinig ng kung anong kaluskos. May nararamdaman akong presensya sa likuran ko na bigla namang ikinahumerantado ng kalooban ko.

Pinili kong tumayo na lang at saka dumiretso sa may liblib na parte ng tagong garden. Ang mga halaman na palaging sinisend ni London sa akin ay nakita ko na nang malapitan.

Binuksan ko ang phone at saka kumuha ng mga litrato. Magse-selfie na sana ako kasama ang mga halaman nang may narinig na naman ako.

Hindi ko mapigilan na mapaigtad lalo na nang umihip ang hangin at mas nadepina ang pamilyar na nakakahipnotismong amoy. Hindi man siya palaging gumagamit ng pabango noon, napapansin ko pa rin iyon.

"Valentines," the voice of the man I've been avoiding filled my ears. Napasinghap ako dahil sa kalaliman niyon pero kahit ganoon, maganda pa rin pakinggan.

Strike to nth time, Vanilla! Why are you complimenting him?

Sa kabila ng naghuhumerantado kong kalooban ay nagawa ko pa rin siyang harapin.

Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay at tatalikuran na sana siya para makapagpatuloy sa pagkuha ng mga litrato nang nagsalita ulit siya.

"Do you want me to take a picture of you with the plants?" He offered, a small smile forming in his lips. He looks amused but it only enraged me.